To Go Where No One Can Hear you

Pins and Needles

For my lovely one and only reader who insisted I continue writing, Asian.

I'm dead. I'm dead I'm dead I'm dead. Wait...no I'm not. Dead people don't feel like they've been hit by a truck.

I slowly blinked open my eyes and was hit by a wall of bright light. Maybe I am dead. Maybe this is the dimension between life and death. Then my eyes adjusted and I realized I was in a white room. There were bright fluorescent lights all over. I was laying on something soft. A mattress of some sort I think. I heard a beeping and looked over to my right to see a - heart monitor?

I tried to sit up and all of a sudden a wave of pain washed over me, especially my head and I felt a sharp stabbing pain in my arm. I looked down to see a thin, clear tube protruding from my arm. Attached to a needle. Oh sweet baby Jesus. A needle. The heart monitor started beeping extremely fast. I looked away as fast I could. I couldn't stand needles. All of a sudden a woman rushed in through a door across from my bed I hadn't noticed, dressed in white. I must have set off some sort of alarm by sitting up and making the heart monitor speed up.

"Hon you need to lay back down" she said, rushing over to my bed. She gently started pushing me back down on to the bed. "Wait" I said, pushing her hands off of me. "Where am I?" I asked. "Your at Mercy Hospice darlin' " she replied. I thought for a second. Mercy was at least 20 miles from my apartment. What had happened?

"You were in a car accident" she said, as if she was reading my mind. A car accident? How the hell did I get in a car accident? I was always careful while driving...I didn't drive in bad weather, I never sped, I never drove while I was upse-Oh. My. God. It all came rushing back. Theo. The deer. The man in the back of my truck. I started panicking. Where was he man? Was he coming for me? Wait- where was my truck?

"Hon you need to calm down, now." she said. I hasn't noticed the heart monitor speeding up again. I tried taking deep breaths to relax.

"Where's my truck?" I asked. "It's out in the parking lot sweetie." I started to relax a little bit. Wait. "And the man?" I asked urgently. She looked confused. "What man?" She asked. "The man!", I exclaimed, "The man in the back of my truck!". She hesitated. "Hon, You've got a concussion. You hit your head pretty hard. I don't think that your able to think clearly." "No!" I yelled, "There was a man! He's what made me crash!" The nurse backed away slightly. "I'm going to go get the doctor...just...just stay put ok?" She said, looking slightly frightened. I groaned and fell back on the bed, pretending to give up and listen. "Fine." I said. She glanced at me one final time before turning around and walking out of the room.

As soon as she did, I whipped off the covers and scrambled off of the bed. And fell on my face. I felt the sharp pull of the IV. I managed to pull off the patches attached to me to monitor my heart. The machine went silent. Then I grabbed the metal pole with wheels that held my IV bag and used it to pull myself up. As soon as I took a step my head felt like hammers were hitting it and I was hit with a wall of dizziness. I leaned against the pole for support. In doing so, I noticed another bag hanging by the IV bag that looked exactly the same, yet slightly smaller. I tried to shake off some of my dizziness and squinted to read the label. Morphine. I managed a smile. Morphine was one of the strongest pain killers. I had used it before when I cut my arm in the shop once.

I fumbled around with the IV tube, looking for a button to release the meds. I slowly looked down the length of the cord and-boom. There is was. I jabbed my finger into the button and almost immediately the dizziness and major headache was cleared. I dropped the tube and started heading for the door. As soon as I reached the door I leaned against it for a second, trying to catch my breath. Then I pushed it open and walked into the hall.

I looked both ways and, not seeing anyone, decided to go left. I kept clutching onto the IV pole for support as I wheeled it along besides me. I continued down the hall until I came to an intersection of hallways. I had four directions to choose from. Right, left, forward, or to go back the way I came. I decided left again. While some people had a lucky number, I had a lucky direction. If I was lost, turn left. If I couldn't decide, go left, etc.

Unfortunately, this time my lucky direction wasn't quite so lucky. As soon as I turned the corner I bumped directly into a nurse. "Oh my gosh! I'm sorry!" She exclaimed. Then she got a good look at me. "Why aren't you in your room?" She asked. "Oh...um...I was just going to get food." I lied. "Not in your condition your not" she said, eyeing the bandage on my head and my tight hold on the IV pole. "Hon, I've worked here for 15 years" she said, "And I know that our patients aren't just sent down to get food. We bring it up to them." She gently grabbed my elbow and pulling me back the way I came.

"Wait!" I said, looking over her shoulder at the glass double doors behind her leading outside. "Can I just get some fresh air?" She studied my face, as if she was trying to decide if I was trying to trick her or not. She sighed. "Fine. But we'll have to be quick, you really shouldn't be out of your room." She said. "We'll?" I asked. "Yes, you can't just expect me to let you walk outside by yourself." I sighed. She turned around and we walked down the hallway past the front desk to the doors. I felt like I had enough strength to not be leaning onto the IV pole so I let go of it. As soon as she opened the doors and we got a few feet into the parking lot, I looked around, scanning. Scanning the parking lot for my truck.

I finally spotted it, about three rows away from we were standing. I glanced over at the nurse. She was looking back at the hospital, probably wishing I would hurry up. I quietly reached up and unhooked the IV and morphine bags from the pole, keeping an careful watch other to make sure she didn't notice.

I took a deep breath -and I ran.