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I Wish

L.T. POV

I turned towards him, only to find him facing away.

"Sleep well, Haz". It was the only piece of comfort I could offer.

"Yeah, whatever"

Of course, it was bluntly rejected. Not that I wasn't to blame for him feeling this way. In fact, I was the only one to blame. If I I'd been strong enough, just for that one day, none of this would've ever happened.

I took in his sleeping form. It was exactly the same as when I first met him. He would lie straight for a while, like a proper adult. But as he went in deeper, he would loosen up, knees slowly drawn towards his chest, arms folding closer towards his body.

I smiled at the familiarity. He had grown so much, physically and mentally. He definitely was not the boy I knew, the boy whose heart I ripped to pieces. This was a whole new person, stronger, and darker.

I sighed to myself. I focused on the sleeping boy. His breathing was deep, which meant a bomb going off wouldn't wake him now. Liam had asked me to check on him, and if I don't have any real update, he would probably strangle me. So I slipped of the bunk and padded towards Harry's.

It was nerve-wrecking, to say the least, being together like this, after all those years.

I slowly reached out and touched his arm. He didn't stir. Okay, I could do this.

First, I checked his pulse. It was slow, just enough to keep him alive as he dreamt.

Then I put my hand to his forehead to check for fever. He was hot. Literally.

I sighed. Liam was gonna freak out. I had to do something. I looked around our bus and found some face towels. Getting down a bowl from the pantry, I filled it with cold water and added some baby cologne, courtesy of Niall's shelf. That boy was a sucker for sweet scents.

I took it all back to the bunk, and lay them down on a small table. I dipped the towel in the solution, wrung it out, and slow as ever, started to dab Harry's forehead with it. I could see him flinch immediately at its coldness, but then seemed to relax. It didn't seem to bother him much, so I continued for a while, my hand switching to auto pilot and my mind wandering off.

Four years ago

"Louis, do you have a moment?" It was our manager. I was never called in for private meetings with the board. Well, today is my lucky day. I even texted Harry.

Just got called in for a PM with The People. Have any idea what it might be about?

Nope. Might be about the album. Text me when you get home. :)

Okay xx

"Hello, Louis" It was Simon, in his all-business mood, with the other board members, sitting at a conference table in room 13. All poker faces. It was definitely intimidating.

"Hey"

"So, do you know what this is about?"

"Er, no, not exactly".

"Well, this", he said, pointing to a screen, "is what it's all about".

I was stunned. A million pictures flashed before my eyes, all of them featuring Harry & I. Our first picture together, all our hugs, our private convos, all laid out for everyone to see.

"Can you tell me the meaning of this, Louis?"

"I.."

He cut me off.

"Because I have looked at these a million times now, and all I see are two boys who are practically salivating over each other. And that, or anything else even remotely related to this", he said, pointing to a picture where Harry was looking at me, "is not going to happen. Are we clear, Tomlinson?"

"But I.."

"I said", he stood up, towering over me. "are we clear?"

I swallowed, looking down. "Yes, sir".

He sat back down. "Good. Oh, and I think knowing that your position in the band and your freedom of communication with Styles are at stake will be a constant reminder of this...agreement", he smiled. It took little imagination to conjour up the pitchfork and horns that were invisible. "We are done. Off you go".

I was struggling to keep my composure till I got out of that stupid room. As soon as I was out, the tears streamed down my face. I could feel my hands trying to rip out my hair. I could not care less about my position in the band. But being with my friends and Harry? That, I could not give up for the world. Whatever I did now would make Harry hate me forever, but at least I got to see him, to work with him. I just had to control myself around him. Which was damn hard, considering the fact that I was falling in love with him.

He was so innocent, with his wonderful curls and charming personality. He was hurt so quickly, and I loved his fragility. It was a constant reminder for me to have boundaries when I was playing tricks on people, or annoying them, just for fun. He was like a little bird, and I loved taking care of him, though he was the one doing all the real work. Cooking, washing, cleaning, you name it, and Harry was the one who did it at our apartment.

When he kissed me, it was like I had found the meaning of life.

And then, along came the spider, and frightened Harry Styles away from me for the rest of my life.

Present Day

'Splosh!'

The saturated towel fell from my hand and into the bowl, splashing water everywhere.

The front of my shirt was soaked, and from the slight whimper I heard, so was Harry.

"Hey, shh, it's alright". I quickly put my hand to his forehead, to calm him down and to check his temp. I sighed in relief as I felt Harry's familiar warmth seep into my fingers. He sat up.

"What the-? What do you think you're doing?"

"I was just--"

"Why the hell were you touching me?!". The disgust was clear in his tone.

I was stunned. The anger in those beautiful green eyes was too much for me. I turned away, feeling the sting at the corners of my eyes.

"You were having a bloody fever", I mumbled, "I was just trying to break it".

I got out of the bus and started back towards the others.

I closed my eyes and wished.

If only time could just turn back

'Cause I got three little words

That I've always been dying to tell you...