It's an Ultra-Violence World Afterall

Your Humble Narrator's New Droog

So, there I was, oh my brothers, sitting next to Gemma in chemistry. The devotchka was trying to get me to gossip about some gloopy cal that didn't hold my interest. I viddied at the teacher as he scribbled on the chalkboard. The starry veck's handwriting was practically illegible; not that it really mattered seeing as I wasn't taking any notes. From the corner of my glazzballs, I could see that Gemma's big rot had stopped moving. She was waiting for me to respond to something. 

"Kali are you even slooshying to me?" Gemma demanded. 

I rolled my glazzies, "not really."

"I asked you if you wanted to meet at the moloko mesto this nochy."

"Why would I want to do that? That's Alex and his droogs stomping ground," I replied.

"That's exactly why we have to go! You've peaked his interest."

"Gem, it's Friday, and it's been a long week. I just want to itty back to my flatblock and go bedways."

Gemma huffed, "Fine, forget Alex and his banda. We could itty to the filmdrome, just the dva of us."

"Gemma and Kali," the teacher had finally had enough of our shroom. Our teacher was a thin veck with only one rook. Must of us nadsats assumed he had been born that way, viddying as there was no scar tissue where his wrist was. Gemma once made the mistake of telling me that she couldn't focus on anything in this class other than his nub. Your Humble Narrator made sure to give her an earful about respect. 

"Our appy polly loggies," Gemma said, flashing him a zoobie grin. She knew I'd be watching her carefully, so she made sure not to look at his rookless rooker.

"So what made you do it?" Gemma asked once our teacher had turned around once again.

"What made me do what?"

"Pick a bitva with that bratchny?" Gemma elaborated.

I shrugged my pletchos, "someone was bound to do thusly eventually."

I wanted her to stop running her rot, so I pretended to start taking notes. Now, Gemma knew I wasn't really interested in whatever our teacher was saying, but she got the message. Now, don't get me wrong, oh my brothers, Gemma was one of my best droogs, but she and I came from different worlds. Her pee and em's rabbit left her with a real horrorshow amount of pretty polly in her carmans, whereas my pee and I had to struggle to get by. Absentmindedly, I began to doodle in my notebook, and, well the rest of biology went by relatively skorry thanks to my wandering rassoodock.

On my way out of class, Your Humble Narrator found a veck waiting for her.

"No need to thank me," I told Cusak.

He rubbed the nape of his shiyah, "oh, oh, oh, I haven't come to do that. I came to ask you if you wanted to hang out sometime."

Damn, all lewdies these days are the same: horny and looking for a bit of the ol' in-and-out. I let out a gromky guff as a warning, "listen, malchick, just because I'm not scared of some eunuch jelly, doesn't mean that I'm going to let you in my neezhnies."

He seemed genuinely taken, "that wasn't my intention in the slightest."

"Of course it wasn't," one of Cusak's banda members interrupted, slinging his rooker around Cusak's scrawny pletcho, "if he wanted to see you nagoy, he wouldn't have to ask."

"Slater," Cusak said so quietly I almost didn't slooshy him, "I can handle this."

James Slater was a nadmenny veck who always vonned of cancer snoutie. His brown glory was gelled up with more grease than was used to cook. Unlike Alex's banda of nadsat creeps, Slater's banda chose not to wear what was considered the height of fashion these days. No, his platties consisted of nothing but leather jackets and spiked sabogs, boots that is. 

Slater now guffed, his listo scrunching up real horrorshow as he did so, "like how you handled yourself earlier today?"

"Slater, if you don't mind, my new droog and I here were in the middle of a conversation."

"Bight me, sooka," he spat, pulling a silver-like britva out of his carman.

"Hey, hey, hey, I don't want no trouble."

"Slater," my biology teacher said sternly, "skolliwoll is no place for your ultra-violence. Save it for some other raz."

Slater viddied at me with his rat-like glazzies, "this isn't over, sooka," he spat, turning to storm away.

"Let's itty," I said to Cusak, "I'll gooly you to your next class."

And that was that, or so, oh my brothers, I thought. Little did I know, that Alex was viddying me gooly down the hallway with my new droog. If I had viddyed him, I would have seen the look of great lust in his big glazzies, lust for me that is. In hindsight, maybe I should've just agreed to go to the filmdrome with Gemma.