The C Word-PHAN FIC

Chapter 2

I returned from a successful shopping trip despite the constant nagging of pain from my back (in which Phil was still convinced is some fatal disease and is making me get constant check-ups on). It was getting better undoubtedly but it worried me deeply that I would never find a position that comfortable ever again.

The sharp winter breeze felt like a hundred tiny needles simultaneously stabbing my cheek. I rummaged in my jacket pocket for the key - train ticket, nope; spare change, nope; aha! I felt the small rusting object run rough against my tender skin. Without an ounce of effort the door swung open and I put on my best face for Phil as I hauled my three shopping bags into the lounge.

"You'll never guess what I found" I blurted out within moments of entering. "nutella-fucking-poptarts!" I couldn't help but exclaim.

Phil did not turn nor reply, I could only assume he was in the middle of reading a tumblr blog. He was shit at multi-tasking. He always takes the piss out of me for being able to do so, calling me 'the women of the house'. I didn't mind though; I liked the thought of being a 'normal couple'.

I had a lot to say, and didn't know how long I could contain it. Regardless of the fact I knew my words were falling on deaf ears, I rambled on "I thought we could have some Mexican tonight? I picked up some salsa from M&S."

Still no response.

I wish I stopped there. If only I could've stopped being so bloody ignorant and asked him what was wrong. But no, I just had to natter on.

"Oh, and I went to the doctor for that check up you insisted and guess what? My back is fine, surprise surprise."

Without warning, I became extremely pissed off that Phil was so disinterested in the doctor's appointment. HE made me go after all.

"For fucks sake Phil, are you even listening?"

He just, sat there. Staring.

"PHIL?! HELLO?! YOU FORCED ME GO TO THAT THING. YOU KNOW I HATE THAT RECEPTIONIST AND YET I WENT BECAUSE YOU ASKED ME TO!"

Ordinarily, I knew this would never bother me. But this was Phil, and I was so used to being able to rely on him to pick me up and turn me around. He always knew what was right or wrong and I trusted in him to keep me on track in life. Right now though, he just didn't seem to care. I hate it when he fusses over me, but at least I knew he cared then.

"Well?" I snapped, impatiently. My body facing directly onto his, shadowing over his even paler than usual face. "Are you going to say ANYTHING?!"

I stood there, my arms crossed and my head fuming. It had been a long day and I needed to get my stress out some how. I usually chose Phil as my victim as I knew he could take it and always calm me down. Wow, he was right. I really am the women in our relationship.

I was a second away from turning my back and heading off into the kitchen to unpack the M&S bag, when Phil said something that I would never be able to fully comprehend or understand.

The next 5 seconds would alter my life forever. All the videos and radio shows, all the jokes and laughs, all the kisses and snuggles. I could never know how much I really loved Phil until this moment, and I hate myself every waking second for that.

"Dan" he stuttered, his eyes never leaving that exact spot that they had been glaring at ever since I got back. "I have cancer."