stalker

chapter 1

From the first message to the last, I knew I wasn't safe... but where do you go when they're everywhere but nowhere? How can you escape something that doesn't have an identity, that doesn't have a life, that's anonymous? You can't. What we had was sick. It was some form of love and mystery.

We loved living in a movie. Except ours was unpredictable. It didn't have the same start, middle or end. That's what I like about it. This Is our story. Our story that only we share. You could never rip out a chapter or press pause whenever you wanted, it was a constant course of text messages, black mailing, mysterious phone calls and in general stalking.

The question isn't why.
The question isn't who.
The question isn't anything
You'll be thinking of.

The question is who was stalking who?
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I've been here for a year now.
A whole year of the same routine, waking up, eating, going to school, Eating, coming home, eating and then sleeping. I wish my life would get more exciting, I want to be able to tell my children or grand-children all these exciting story's of how I travelled the world and my romantic experience was of meeting "the one" etc. But really the only story I'd be telling them is how I wasted my young adult life bingeing on junk food, watching pretty little liars on Netflix and stalking everyone's social media accounts. Fun. I literally have no life at all.

At the moment I'm saving up to get out of this place, just by looking outside my window you'd know exactly why I'd want to move. Everyday I wake up to the same grey, cloudy sky, the same depressing, lifeless trees and the same broken, run-down buildings (complete waste of valuable space). If you let it get to you, I can promise you this environment will get you depressed. Long story short, it got to me.

But I'm not the only one. My dad left my mum and I when I was four. He fled to America after several months. I've always believed that he ran away because of me. Maybe I was just another nothing. Nope, it's this shitty town. Yes, it's that bad that you'll drop and leave everything and anything when you have the chance too.

Mum always used the catch phrase "suck it up honey, that's life" and that's true. You can't waste your time sitting alone in the dark wallowing in your sadness. That's what I've been doing for years. It gets you no-where. You can tell im trying to recover.

I could literally sleep for a century and I'd still wake up exhausted. It's four in the morning and I have school in three hours. School. The place where you're promised to get judged by EVERYONE, the place where you have to fit in or you're a "freak", the place where popularity is more important than your grades and the place where you're meant to have the best days of your life at. Ironic.