Jump

Chapter 2

I took a deep breath and let one foot dangle over the edge, thinking about all the things that would happen if I let myself go. I was really contemplating just getting it over with, when my mother called me. 

"Jennifer! Where the hell are you? Jackie is screaming her head off, Jaime needs help with her homework, and dinner needs to be cooked!" She yelled into the phone.

"I'll be there in a few minutes." I replied calmly and looked down one last time. I'll be back, I thought to myself and grabbed my bag. I went downstairs and opened the door to Jackie screaming, Jaime stressing at the table, and my mother on the couch, ignoring it all. Ever since the miscarriage, she's been "depressed" and is incapable of actually acting like a mother. She used to work, but she just stopped going one day. She used to cook dinner every night, but just like work, that stopped too. She used to smile, but that died along with little Jason. 

We all have J names. I'm Jen, well technically Jennifer, but I hate Jennifer. My younger sister, Jaime, is only 13 and just started middle school. I am so protective over her. She has so much going for her. I can't let her turn out like me. She's smart, she's pretty, she's so naive, but so intuitive. Jaime and I stay up some nights just talking about anything and everything. She's my best friend. She's the only person on this planet that I'd actually missed if I died. Jackie on the other hand is 4 years old and spoiled. She gets everything and anything she wants as long as it doesn't require Mommy to get off of the couch. Jackie still acts like a baby even though she's not.

"Mom I'm home!" I yelled as I tossed my bag on the table where Jaime was studying. "Hey Jaime." I said softly and could see how stressed she was. "Go in my room if you need to study." I said and went over to Jackie. I picked her up and carried her to her and Jaime's room to play with her toys. She finally stopped screaming and started playing. 

"Mom, Dad told me to tell you that he was going out tonight." I said, trying not to think about it too much.

"Did he say where he was going?" She asked, peeling her eyes away from the TV.

"Nope, and I didn't ask because frankly, I don't give a flying fuck." Is what I wanted to say.

"No, I forgot to ask." I said politely and pulled my hair up into a ponytail.

I went into the kitchen and grabbed the ground beef from the fridge. I turned on the stove and started cooking it. I grabbed a big pot and let the water boil. I decided to make spaghetti that night, if Dad came home drunk and needed a snack, maybe this would sober him up quick. I still had a small amount of my high left, but I knew it was fading quickly. I really wanted to go take a few hits, but I knew I couldn't without getting caught. 

I grabbed my phone and turned on some music as I cooked. Music helped me pull me into an alternate universe and kept my mind off of my shitty reality. I always had to use headphones because if I played my music too loud, it would interrupt my mother's television watching. I finished cooking and made everyone's plate. I put my father's plate in the microwave and put a note on the microwave.I handed my mother her plate of food along with her drink. I went into the room to get Jackie and put her in the seat. I peeked my head into my room where Jaime was studying and told her dinner was ready. I carried Jackie to the table and set her down before I sat down. I was so hungry. Smoking weed always gave me the munchies. That was one of my favorite things about being high. The munchies. The weirdest things were the best together. Nacho Cheese Doritos and the Kraft Mac and Cheese together was my favorite! That sounded really good right now. I laughed at myself for thinking about food while I was eating food.

Jaime and Jackie started eating quickly, Jackie making a mess of herself and Jaime complimenting my food. I knew it wasn't the best, but we needed to go grocery shopping. Correction, I needed to go grocery shopping. Mom just gave me a list of food and other necessities, and I was responsible for getting them. Thankfully I got my license last year, but my parents have yet to get me a car. I just borrow my mom's from time to time, like when I have to pick up the girls, dad, or groceries. I hate feeling like the only one who has some grip on reality. Dad works all day, then goes out. Mom stays home all day, ironically sucked into reality TV. She spends hours every day on Keeping Up With The Kardashian's and yet, she can't even keep up with her own damn family. She just found out that Jaime started middle school this year. Hell, she doesn't even know I'm graduating this year.