Sat beside you watching your chest no longer rises.No more sadness, no more disugises.Any love which grows and blooms turn into the darkest depths of hate inside of you.Skin ice cold.Snow flakes falling.The day feels old even though it's only morning.
Let your fears sail across the ocean until you can longer see them.Watch them sail,sail, sail, away.
You were always a friend to me right up until the end.You swimmed through a lake of sadness it was a cruel trick it sucked you in but never spat you out.You weren't a sour taste to sadness you were sweet very sweet like honey.You swimmed through the lake similar to a fish at first you didn't know it was a lake of unhappiness.You let it hold your hand and make you feel all safe, warm ,content.Like two lovers strolling along the beach as sunset shows it's face.Hands together keeping the bond strong showing a feeling to one another.An as the last rays go down it's over all over....
They let go and so did you.It was then you knew it wasn't your friend but you had already taken the bate and been lured into a net.You couldn't get out and you hardly breathed a word to a soul.When I saw you I could see you getting weaker and weaker.I was your friend but you never saw it I didn't want anything from you I could see you was drowning.An you couldn't see it.You hated everything I was.
An then you saw it you looked into a mirror of you and saw it.You saw your self drowning and it was to strong now no matter how hard you fighted back.You didn't stand a chance you couldn't undo what was done.But tried and tried until one day you gave up.You jumped and died .When ever I try to picture it though I don't see a friend, another soul, women,person dying.I see a white dove soaring through the sky.
Two weeks later...
I sit by the lake of your depression one last time, one last time, one last time I tell myself.I hurl a rock at the lake it's mouth stretches open and begs me for more, more, more.It swallows the rock whole in one.The rock hit the surface and starts to drown not even knowing it until the very end.It was to heavy to reach the surface and and and...
just just hits the floor and stayed their not been able to reach the surface ever again.An I like to imagine that this little rock regrets it and wants to get out.I imagine you as that rock.I imagine your words one last time in my head.Just one more time nothing more.
"I can't be fixed" You yelled so loud everyone turned around and looked your way.I could see the combination of anger, hatred, sadness, regret all inside of you.I couldn't find any words to make everything okay I had no reply.My mouth opened and closed like a goldfish .I couldn't find any words to make everything okay.An then I saw the most heart breaking thing I ever saw.Silent tears falling down someones face because theirs so much anger,sadness behind it all.With even more depth than unsilent ones.An thats when you turned away and made your way through the crowd.
I picture a butterfly with wings as blue as a summer sky and wings the size of my palms.I picture her flying past clouds, behind the sky it self, until she finds another world.A women playing the harp, a path and if you follow it you will find a foutain in the middle of everything,flowers thousands of them maybe even millions.Roses the deepest red known to man,tulips the best and brightest kind of yellow their is,soft pink ones, towering sunflowers, violets,pure white roses, and much much more.So many flowers so many beautiful flowers I can't count them all everyone one of them perfect.A sweet smell of flowers, millions of butterflies so some of them create a rainbow.Yes a rainbow one with the brightest colours you've ever set eyes on and their wings moving.An the others fly around lost not knowing which flower to pick.
An the memories are carried to me one by one.I remeber the good ones not the bad becuase I think thats what killed you the bad memories.An the happy ones?They are in a colour full child like scrap book and when I open it I flick through each page they jump out at me "boo" they say and I smile to myself.I let one take me away from everything and relive everything thats good.An like I told you to do I let my fears sail across the ocean with a blue sky and huge white clouds which remind me of marshmellows.An when it's over everything is not good,bad, it's okay.
You are the single white feather which fallen in my hand yesterday so delicate oh so delicate,you are the brightest star in night sky, you are the withering red roses which lie by your grave I know I'll never forget you, but your meaning to others is withering.I'm standing by your grave now I want to punch someone in the gut and make them feel the pain I feel and you felt.I want the whole world to know how great you truly are.I .... just want my best friend back.My only best friend but you never saw that.An now I'm praying to god every night your happy and no longer hate me.An I'm trying so hard to live my life to the full for both of us.
