The Story With No Name

     She was the Princess of the castle. I was a peasant living on the streets outside. I had almost nothing to my name but my old guitar. I would walk aimlessly by and by. Sometimes I'd see the luxurious estate and wish I lived there, but I'd always walk away, back into the reality of the life God has given me. Am I a bad man? No. I guess this is just where God has placed me, so I just accept it and move on day after day...

     But then I saw her. She looked out of the open window of the castle to see the morning. I stared, wondering how I never saw her before. She was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen! I was only of 16 years, and surely hadn't seen everything, and still haven't, but I knew that much was true. Suddenly, as I stared, she looked down. I know she saw me! I know it! No one else was walking by that morning! However, whether or not she caught me staring at her, I don't know. I didn't look away quite quick enough. It seems as though I should have felt humiliated if she had seen someone of my class looking all the way up to her, but I didn't. I wasn't sure of what I actually did feel as I walked away pretending I hadn't been staring, but I had never seen any human quite like her. I turned my head back for a quick glance as I went on my way like I had somewhere to be. She was looking at me again! That glance, I know she caught. She was smiling beautifully. She walked away from the window just as I did from the castle. Maybe she was still smiling. If she was, I would think it was out of pity. I was smiling ear to ear as I still tried to figure out what I was feeling. I thought, by the way she smiled at me, that maybe she had somehow looked past my appearance. Not a lot of people do. I kept walking, going nowhere, but knowing I'd march right back to the castle to hopefully see her again.

     For a few days, I saw nothing, but when I saw her again... She actually talked to me! After we looked at each other for a couple of seconds, though it somehow felt like a lifetime, she said, smiling, "Can I help you?"

     Smiling back, I pointed to my raggedy clothes and I remarked sarcastically, "What gives you the idea that I need help?"

     She laughed! I couldn't believe it! I got chills when she spoke and almost stuttered when I replied. I was practically counting the seconds that she spent bothering to talk to me. I knew it now. She saw right through the way I looked on the outside. There was just something different about her. I wanted our conversation to go on forever, and it lasted a good half-hour that seemed like forever. I was enjoying every single moment of this time while I had it.

     Soon enough, we were talking every day. She would come to the door rather than us shouting to each other from her window to the where I stood. The more we talked, the further she would come out of the castle. Rather than staying at the door, we'd sit back against the castle. Either way, we would just talk like we'd been friends forever. Like me, she was weird. She learned quickly how strange I am, so she felt at home, I could tell. She was able to be herself around me, and I was myself around her. Being myself has never worked on any girl the way it worked on her. We would talk every day, and I'd usually play a little music for her on my guitar, but then try to let her do most of the talking. Despite my usual state of ADD, I was abnormally attentive to figure out the time she often woke in the morning. I was never late. There was nowhere on Earth I wanted to be more than at the door of her castle waiting to spend the day just talking to her. I had never seen anyone leave the castle before her. Other people also looked surprised to see her on the outside, and even more so that she was sitting by me. Whether I was having a rough day or I felt fine, she was always there for me. I learned as much as I could about her while still being careful to savor every second of the time I had to talk to her. It was unbelievable! It was as if she also didn't want to be anywhere else in the world! I wondered how this was possible until I realized... It's not! The impossible is happening right in front of me! I've always believed in the impossible because I believe firmly in God. But this seems like a new level of impossible that I've never known about before! I realized that... I loved her! I'd never loved any girl before. I even dated a girl once when I was younger and a bit better looking, but I didn't know what love was back then. When I met God, I learned what love was, and this was it. I loved her. I had no doubt about it. I soon figured out just how much I really loved her... Because I lost her.

     One day, about a month later, all felt well like any other day we spent together, but she had to go back into the castle early. She never said why. The next two days, we talked for only a short time from her window to the ground, like that first day. For days, or a week or two after that, I'd sit against the castle wall, waiting right where she and I always sat. Sometimes she'd come to the window and wave, and I wanted to talk to her so badly, but she never even opened her window to say hi. Part of me thought that I should have seen that coming. The rest of me hoped and prayed that she would just come around again.

     A couple of months had passed. I watched for her diligently. There's one thing I noticed: there's a Prince in the picture now. And how am I supposed to compete with that? I had a hard time moving past that when I saw it. I had a good friend from another place that I told about what happened. This friend didn't know who the Princess was, so I felt comfortable talking about it. I felt better, though still broken. Days, maybe a week or more later, I passed by the castle, and she came out to talk to me again. It was nice. I had missed it. From that day, and to this day, she comes out at random times to find me. I always hang around the castle playing my guitar. I will gladly talk to her when she comes. Sadly, I sometimes cannot get her to say much to me like she used to. Maybe I really did want her come out to talk to me, but when she didn't, I wasn't bothered. I had other friends too. Sometimes it feels like I'm hardening my heart toward her, but I reassure myself that I'm just trying to move on. My joy shouldn't be found in her. My joy should come from God. Even still, I hope she doesn't forget me.

     You may think this story is a bit strange, and you're probably right. This is not Disney or some sappy Hallmark movie. My mind sometimes drifts back to that first time she went back into the castle early. I still don't know why she stopped coming out to talk to me. Back when the Princess and I used to sit against the the castle wall and talk everyday, I thought that, just maybe, I had a chance. It would have needed a miracle, and I believe in the God who performs them, but no miracle came this time. The main character doesn't get the girl in this one. It feels like this story is missing something. Maybe it's not over, or maybe there will always will be something missing. God only knows. Am I a bad man? No. This is just where God has placed me, so I just accept it and move on day after day...