So we got to the church everything was set up there was a lot of family crying i wasn't (not suprised) i always hold in my tears and replace em with anger. I'm known in the family as being "the brave one" but in the inside i was crying like crazy i didn't smile even once on the way the there it was nothing but pure silence in the car. I made my way through the crowd and looked at the wall, they were projecting all the pictures and memory videos of tron on the wall and i started to shed a couple tears i ran to the bathroom knocking a couple people over but they understood i could tell cause they just went on with there crying. I stared in the mirror in the bathroom and my Alter ego took over i started talking to silver (my alter ego) saying......
Me: You can do this Roxanna
Silver: No I can't its obvious I'm not the brave one i don't know who they think i am but brave is not one of em
Me: I'm known as brave i may not have much of it in me but i have to use it
Silver: Know you don't just drop it for a day i promise it'll be ok
Me: no it wont i know tron wouldn't want me to he would always make me smile
Silver: yeah but HE'S GONE!!!!!!
Me: no he's not
Silver: Yes he is don't you remember it was a drive by shooting Me: (stop) all the blood right on his chest Me: (stop)his shirt blood in the grass on moms hands everywhere Me: STOP!!!!
While saying stop to silver apparently i did not while saying stop i nearly punched the mirror but someone grabbed my fist as soon as i came in contact with the mirror. I look to my right and see tron standing there smiling like in his grad picture he puts his hand down back into the pose, i blink twice and see that it was my mom Joanne. She says "listen i know were all mad here but i don't wanna see you get 7 years of bad luck because you punched a mirror on your little brothers funeral do you wanna be remembered by that?"
I answer with a sigh no
She answers ok and lets go of my fist and walks out.
I look at myself in the in the mirror one last time to be safe and leave we all sit down in a seat everyone has a chance to talk then its my turn i try to hold back the tears. But i couldn't all i got out was "Tron was" then i bursted into tears i said i can't do this and ran outside fell to my knees put my hands on my face and started crying i said tron over and over Cassie came out to comfort me but i just kept saying no then my mom came out and they both got me to stop crying i made it through the rest of the funeral and went home......
