A/N; No lemon here, but you know it has to be rated PG because of Hidan's dirty mouth~ This is so random. xD
"Enemy sighted," Sakura grinned as she put on her gloves while hiding behind a bush. This was it. Her pleads on Tsunade of having a solo mission has finally been granted. She is confident enough to advance on the enemy with her own resplendent dexterity. No, she wasn't the burden she was years ago, being the little coward that only depended on her teammates. Now she doesn't need Naruto, Sai, Kakashi-sensei or even...Sasuke. She was a fine kunoichi on her own.
Attack commencing...now.
Boom. The ground shook and shattered upon the punch of the pink-haired kunoichi, succeeding her jump from the bush. She now stood in front of her enemy with eyes as sharp as the hawk. She wasn't gonna fail this mission. Nope.
"TAKE THIS!" Sakura lunged on her enemy with her fist ready to knock the life off this criminal. This S-rank criminal. This S-rank Akatsuki criminal.
This...Hidan.
"What the fuck?!" Hidan leaped off the area the pink-haired kunoichi was about to jab onto. 'That was fucking close,' he thought to himself as the kunoichi landed her fist on a tree instead which led to rooting off the tree on the ground and sending it flying to god knows where. That poor poor tree.
"Oi, fucking bitch, why the fuck did you attack me?!" Hidan yelled with a hint of anger on his voice as he landed safely upon a tree branch. 'That fucking Kakuzu is gonna pay for leaving me, resulting to me dealing with a bitch alone,' he thought once again while scowling. "Look bitch, I'm on my fucking way to finish my ritual on a fucking quiet area and you just so happen to ruin the moment. You are so gonna feel the wrath of fucking Jashin," he now yelled with irritation and anger evident on his voice.
"Is this a new language called Cuss-ese?" Sakura rolled her eyes at the enemy, "I am so gonna shove tic tacs on your dirty mouth!" Hidan shot her a look and scowled once more at her choice of words. "If I were you, I would run. Or I would fucking sacrifice you to fucking Jashin," he smirked at her.
"...what is a Jashin?"
"IT'S MY FUCKING GOD, BITCH!"
"BASTARD, I AM NOT A BITCH! WHAT KIND OF LUNATIC RELIGION ARE YOU EVEN FOLLOWING!"
"DID YOU JUST FUCKING INSULT MY FUCKING RELIGION!?"
"YES!"
"YOU DON'T EVEN FUCKING KNOW WHAT IS JASHINISM! YOU FUCKING DIMWITTED WHORE."
"OH YEAH! WELL I'LL SHOW WHO KNOWS MORE ABOUT JASHINISM, YOU JERK!"
"OH? YOU'RE NOT EVEN A FUCKING JASHINIST!"
"YEAH! I MEAN NO! WHAT THE HELL. I'M GOING TO BE A JASHINIST AND I'M GONNA TELL JASHIN TO KICK YOUR ASS!"
"OH YEAH WE'LL FUCKING SEE ABOUT THAT BITCH!"
By that time, Sakura's neck had glowed and a necklace became visible. It was the same necklace as Hidan's.
"Oh.my.fucking.Jashin."
"What? What the hell is this?!"
"FUCK! LORD JASHIN HAS FUCKING MARKED US!"
"OH MY GOD WE'RE GONNA DIE!"
"NO YOU FUCKER. WE'RE MARKED AS.."
"AS WHAT?!"
"As..."
"SPILL IT!"
"AS FUCKING MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER!"
"WHAT?! IS THERE ANY WAY TO CANCEL THIS?!"
"...None."
"......"
"......"
"...I hate you."
"....bitch."
* * *
"So I guess it's a mission accomplished?" Tsunade sipped her tea as Sakura entered the Hokage's room. Her head was hung low and this left a quizzical expression on the Godaime Hokage.
"...I got married."
"WHAT?!" Tsunade choked on her tea. "What do you mean married?!"
"Uh.. it was on the enemy religion and I am not able to kill the enemy because I was marked by the God of the religion and.."
"Mission failed, huh?" Tsunade stated as Sakura nodded weakly. "I'm supposed to live with him or else I'll slowly fade away.." Sakura added with a hint of sadness on her voice. "Doesn't matter at least you went home in one piece. Since you're married to an S-rank criminal by.. accident, you can go whenever you want with your husband. " Sakura gasped and looked at Tsunade who was smiling, "You're still young. You have so many things to learn out in this world. I am not going to mark you as a missing nin or whatsoever. Just don't get engaged in battle with them."
"Shishou, is this right?"
"Yes."
"I'll be missed by everyone and-"
"Pffft, forget about that. You can visit, remember."
Sakura was in the verge of tears and Tsunade, being her mentor, embraced her.
* * *
"So why the fuck are you still here?"
"I am so not gonna die, jerk."
"I'm a fucking S-rank criminal, you know bitch?"
"I know that!"
"....."
"I'm gonna be with you no matter what you say. I'm gonna annoy you till death do us apart."
"....fuck."
