SEPARATED

ELEVEN

ANTONIO:

Sarah was happy. I could see it, I could feel it. She radiated happiness like the sun radiates warmth. She looked so beautiful smiling and laughing. I had never seen her this happy. Deep inside me, her happiness was my own. I was happy that she was happy.

But it didn't take me long to figure out that I was not the source of her happiness. For; from me, she felt distant. She looked uneasy around me, and she would never look me in the eye. She wore guilt in her expressions, the kind of guilt of a cheating wife.

And so I knew her warm smiles and laughter weren't for me. And this brought out a feeling in me that overshadowed my inner happiness. A feeling that could drive a man to do uncalled for actions. It was a feeling I had scarcely felt in my life; it was jealousy.

"Martin; may I have a word with you?"

He rushed up to me,"yes sir?"

"Martin you are a good man, yes?"

"Yes sir."

"I need you to answer me honestly. Can you do that for me?" I enquired taking hold of his shoulders.

"Certainly sir."

"Have you noticed anything unusual with my.... em.... wife of late?"

"Sir; I'm always so busy with my work I scarcely even notice her.... But...."

"Yes, go ahead Martin; go on" I encouraged him curiously.

"Sir, I have noticed the madam has been exceedingly happy over the past week."

I began growing impatient; I was very much aware of her being happy. "Yes Martin, that I know," I said struggling to conceal the frustration in my voice; "but what is making her so happy?"

Had I really just asked my gardener that question? It sounded awkward even in my own ears. I could see from the look on Martin's face, the tension I had created.

"Sir... I..." he began to answer but I stopped him.

"No.... no.... don't answer that, just get back to work." I dismissed him. He nodded and began to return to the garden but I called him back; "Martin...." I said looking him straight in the eyes.... "not a word of this to anyone, okay?" He gulped then nodded and returned to his duties.

I sighed. What was wrong with me. Couldn't I just be happy because my wife was. Was this not what I had wanted all along. Had I not abandoned my mansion in Francis city just to put a smile on her face. Had I not given up my old ways in the name of love.

I took a look at Sarah. She was blindfolded; playing some game with Eve and one of my other employees. They laughed merrily as Sarah chased after the other two, grabbing, without success, at them. Sarah tripped over a small rock and fell against her left knee. She yelled in pain. I began to race to her side but someone was already there comforting her. It was......Jacob?

I stopped in my tracks and just watched. There was a way Sarah looked at Jacob. A way that she had never looked at me. It was like she was searching for something in him; in his eyes. I felt it once again; that evil demon in me that shadowed everything else. I felt jealous.

I rushed up to them and without thinking twice, I pulled Jacob off my wife, to his feet and planted my fist heavily on his jaw. The poor boy flew to the ground like a torpedo. Sarah looked at me in shock, a tear rolling down her cheek. She rushed to the boy's side and held him in her arms placing his head on her laps. I looked at Eve and she quickly turned away. God, she too was judging me.

I turned and walked away not wanting to cause anymore damage. What had I done!? I had let my jealousy and paranoia control me. I had struck a poor little innocent young man who only had pure intentions for my wife. I had widened the gap that already existed between Sarah and I.

I knew I had just flushed all the work I had put into winning over Sarah down the toilet. And now I was back to square one. In fact I believe I was even worse off than square one now. I didn't know what to do. I pulled out my phone and scrolled till I found Adam's number. Yes he was the man I wanted to be nothing like; but it was he who had managed to keep his wife for several years despite his gambling problem.

"Calm down Antonio. It isn't the end of the world. Listen, Sarah is your wife. She knows it's normal for her husband to get jealous. As a matter of fact, she might even be proud that you got jealous. It makes women feel more special."

"You think Adam," I asked ready to try anything.

"Absolutely Adam. Just tell her it's the way he looked at her; something like that..."

"Thanks Adam" I said and hang up.

And so later that day at sunset I looked for Sarah to talk to her. I found her seated in the backyard on a bench from which you could get a perfect view of the sunset. She had her chin against her knees and looked really depressed. I sat next to her and sighed.

"hey" I broke the silence but she said nothing. She didn't even look at me. "Sarah, listen...about earlier today; I'm really... "

But she didn't; she didn't listen one minute. She just got up and walked away. She left me there talking to myself.

"Give her time..." I said to myself. "Give her time Antonio... "

★★★★★