Aries:I'll find those stairs. I'll whip their butt, too. Those stairs won't know which way they're going... take drastic steps, kick it to the curb. Don't mess wit' me.
Taurus:We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I'm making waffles!
GEMINI:For your information, there's a lot more to ogres than people think.
Cancer:You cut me deep, Shrek. You cut me very deep just now... You know what, Shrek? I think this whole wall thing is to keep somebody out!
Leo:You can't do this to me, Shrek, I'm too young for you to die! Keep your feet elevated! Turn your head and cough! Does anybody know the Heimlich...?
Virgo:The line, the line you gotta wait for: the priest's gonna say "Speak now or forever hold your piece", and you rush in and say "I object!"
Libra:NO! Not the buttons! Not my gumdrop buttons!
Scorpio:I live in a swamp! I put up signs! I'm a terrifying ogre! What do I have to do to get a little privacy?
Sagittarius:All right, nobody move! I've got a dragon and I'm not afraid to use it! I'm a donkey on the edge!
Capricorn:Now really, it's rude enough being alive when no one wants you, but showing up uninvited to a wedding?
Aquarius:That's right, fool! Now I'm a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha!
Pisces:I just know, before this is over, I'm gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. Look at my eye twitchin'.
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Zodiac Signs
RandomAnything about your zodiac sign! It might be spot on or totally different, who knows? What is your sign? (I get a lot of these from Tumblr, I don't take credit for any of them.) I will try an update every week, 3 to 4 times a week, depending on how...