Erikat - Fishy Romance (BoyxBoy)

2-Absolutely Crabby

sooo, hey-hey! though i'm practically a coward with being a karkat, but i decided to aaat least do him anyways, while gray-gray handles the eridan! heehee! oh, and i suppose i'll be handling first person as well. i might do the same view perspective, but from the nubby troll. anyways, lets get started!

~<>~

I doubt that anyone will realize this. But my life fucking SUCKS. Yeah, the annoying catgirl and everyone else are here to 'humor' me, I don't really get a fucking choice but to sit here and write this shitty piece of garbage. Right over there Eridan is currently talking to Sollux. Geez, those two are so obsessive with their relationship. Possibly a kismesistude. I don't fucking care. I mean, obviously, I'm not the fucking shipper freak around here.

I blinked my eyes as I focused back onto my work. Oh right, I should be typing up a stupid plan for these lousy assholes. I'd pretty much like to see these idiots up and working for once, but hey, WHAT THE FUCK EVER. I pull up my Trollium to realize the retarded white text guy is messaging me. Ugh, I'm just going to ignore him. I need to finish my fucking plan, and nobody else is going to do it, so there's a goddamn reason.

I sit back in my chair to think. There's been a recent problem, which my future self won't leave me alone. Lets just get over with it.

"-- FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] began pestering CURRENT carcinoGeneticist [CCG] at ??:?? --

"FCG: ATTENTION PAST ME. I HAVE OFFICIALLY CHANGED MY VIEW OF YOU. YOU ARE FUCKING TRASH."

"CCG: FUCK YOU. I MEAN, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW I FUCKING TRIED. OH WAIT, YOU DID."

"FCG: EXACTLY."

"FCG: I DON'T UNDERSTAND, BUT THE PLAN IS GOING TO FAIL."

"CCG: HOW? WHAT PLAN?"

"FCG: OH RIGHT. FUCK I WENT TOO FAR BACK."

"CCG: CONGRATULATIONS. YOU FAILED ONCE AGAIN."

"FCG: SHUT UP, I CAN HANDLE THIS."

"CCG: OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN'T. JUST FUCKING LEAVE ME ALONE FOR ONCE."

"FCG: HA. HA HA."

"CCG: GO DO YOUR WORTHLESS FUTURE JUNK AND STOP BOTHERING ME."

"FCG: WHATEVER. FUCKASS."

Before I could reply, I was interrupted with a familiar voice, my moirail, you could say. "hEy, KaRbRo! HoNk." I turned to notice he's brought the stupid douche over. He nudges my rib, which of course, nobody would care if it were fucking broken or some shit. "Gamzee, I fucking swear to god I will fucking leave you in the..." I tried not to give the fishbreath any... further contact that could lead any sort of romantic inquiries or whatever. I know this shit! I'm the master of fucking romance!

"UM..." Shit, why the fuck is it hard to reply?! "... HI." Way to go, Karkat. Nepeta's possibly looking straight over my direction and ready to put her first shipping from days of patience. It'd be for the best not to give eye contact, Karkat. Don't you fucking dare give eye contact- He walked straight up to me, which of course, my eyes refused to avoid the contact. FUCK!! KARKAT, YOU IDIOT!

"hello. wwhat's your name then?" How the hell does he not know me? For fucks sake, I'm the leader here! Might as well humor him. Who knows? Maybe it'll form to kismesistud- Karkat, no! No quadrants with the douchefin! "KARKAT VANTAS." Might as well just start out for whatever reason. "WHAT'S YOUR'S, OR SHOULD I CALL YOU THE WEIRD GUY CHECKING ME OUT?" Karkat, no. Don't you dare. Show the fish douche you're the leader.

The fish's pupils possibly shrank in surprise. Heh. "tch, i wwould wwatch your tongue, you lowwblood..." Did he just fucking- "... but... it's eridan ampora." THIS STILL ISN'T RIGHT, ASSHOLE. "DON'T FUCKING CALL ME A LOWBLOOD, HIPSTER, AND PLUS, YOU SHOULD'VE ALREADY KNOWN MY FUCKING NAME. I'M THE LEADER HERE, AFTER ALL! SERIOUSLY, HOW THE FUCK DO YOU NOT KNOW IT? TCH. CALLING ME A LOWBLOOD." Did- Did his reaction just- I think I got a kismesis- Oh. "wwhatevver, shortie. i wwouldn't take orders from you, anywways."

He DID NOT- UGH!! "OH, SHUT UP. I COULD BEAT YOUR ASS ANY DAY, FISH BOY."

"don't call me fish boy!"

Gamzee immediately stepped in the gap that signalled our arguementative shockwaves, his arms spread like a wild cawbeast, sort of. "oH, cOmE oN. cAlM yOuR bRoTaStIc SeLvEs DoWn. We'Re AlL fRiEnDs HeRe RiGhT? nOw CoMe On ErIdAn, sAy SoRrY tO tHe LiTtLe DuDe." OH. SO MY MOIRAIL GOES TO THE DOUCHE'S SIDE? I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN. "...sorry." He then turned to me, exactly saying the things I knew he'd say. "CoMe On NoW, bRo. SaY sOrRy."

I let out a soft grumble of my apology, which apparently made Gamzee clap like a fool and do his silly magic faygo trick. Seriously, that shit IS NORMAL. "NoW tHaT wAsN't So HaRd WaS iT?! mOtHeR fUcKiN' mIrAcLeS mY bRoThErS... hOnK." Yup. Normal. "WHATEVER. CAN I GO NOW?" The cause of such words made my moirail frown, immediately clinging to me. "WHA-" FUCK, GAMZEE, YOU'RE GOING TO EMBARRASS ME. I began to frantically shake in his grip, letting out my casual hiss.

"GET THE FUCK OFF, GAMZEE!"

"nO cAn Do, bRo."

I yelled loudly, almost like some enraged child. I swear to god I heard him laugh. ... I'm so confused about the asshole, now! Kismesis, Matesprit? Who fucking knows. I'M THE FUCKING MUTANT.

my fingers hurt, but it's a job well done. oh, and maybe next time i'll try just sticking to another time perspective. :B