You don't want baggage / Without lifetime guarantees / You don't want to watch me die.
He stands in front of the grave, holding the coat – the coat that Angel had bought him – tight around him. Only a few hundred yards away, he can hear them fighting and shouting and screaming at each other, but he has no desire to join them, to watch them bicker like children.
He lays a bouquet of roses on the freshly poured soil, touches the engraved words. Angel Dumott Schunard.
I just came to say goodbye love / Goodbye love / Came to say goodbye love / Goodbye.
“I miss you,” he says quietly, his voice echoing around the empty graveyard. “It’s only been a day. And the apartment… it’s empty. Quiet.” He smiles faintly. “I’m keeping that damn pickle tub. We tried to put it in with you but… it didn’t fit. So I hope the drumsticks are enough.”
He sighs.
“Roger’s leaving,” he says softly. “Mimi’s… she’s still staying clean, but she was buying yesterday… Roger yelled at her, and they haven’t spoken. But she’s clean. And Maureen and Joanne… they’re still fighting. And Mark took that job at Buzzline.” He shrugs. “I thought you’d like to know.”
Just came to say / Goodbye love / Goodbye love / Goodbye love / Goodbye.
“And I’m… I’m not okay, I don’t think,” he says softly, his voice cracking slightly. “I
miss you. It’s been three days and I miss you.”
He sighs. “But I think I’ll be up there soon.”
As he says these words, he knows they are true – his blood cells have regrouped their attack on him, and soon, he will be dead dead dead, buried in the ground, shut away in a wooden box.
Please don't touch me / Understand I'm scared / I need to go away.
“And I’m not sure I mind. I miss you. I haven’t gone to Life Support since you died… too many memories there. And none of us go to the café.”
His voice breaks. He kneels in front of the grave, tears growing in his eyes, dripping down his face, falling in the dirt. He wonders if they will sink into the earth, if they will reach down to Angel.
“You said – you said you’d be my shelter, that you’d cover me…” He laughs bitterly. “And yet I’m the one who survives… how does that happen?”
Goodbye love / Goodbye love / Came to say goodbye love / Goodbye. / Just came to say / Goodbye love / Goodbye love / Goodbye love / Goodbye love.
He takes a deep, shaky breath, glances over at the others, fighting and shouting. Mimi is shouting up at Roger, looking up at him. Maureen and Joanne are yelling, screaming, and Mark is trying to calm them, trying to intervene and calm them the way he always does.
He sighs.
“I’ll see you soon,” he whispers, looking up at the sky.
Hello / Disease…
