The unknown

Wishing she knew

She was only 6 years old and because the parents had to work in order give her a good life she needed someone to look after her everyday after school. She viewed it as protection and company because days without her parents and her sisters who were too grown to play with her could get so scary and lonely. It was therefore great to have someone around, someone to just watch her as she played with her dolls, someone to warm the food for her every time she was hungry and someone to sit in front of the tv with and watch cartoons. But he, he was older than her, someone who could be doing much better things than sit around looking after a six year old brat. He was always bored I assume, needed a reason to stick around and watch her everyday. Of what lucrative is it, he asked himself the first day, she's only a little girl, what could I possibly get out of looking after her everyday, what fun thing can I do with her, he added. It was not the best of jobs for a young man, who could be busy with anything else that he may consider more beneficial, he looked for reasons to stay, excuses to leave but there was no one else, no one else to look after this little girl in the absence of her parents. And so one day it dawned on him, that reason to stay that he has been looking for, she's a beautiful little girl he said. I'm a young men, a men with needs, needs that can't currently be met coz I'm stuck here with her. If only I can get what I want from her, everyday that I'm with her then I will happily look after her, he said to himself.
Come, he said to her. Look, he showed her pictures of naked man and woman. Do you know what this is? He asked her? Look at what they are doing? It looks good don't it? Look little girl, he insisted. She looked with her pretty brown eyes covered in fear and confusion. What are they doing? she asked. I'll show you, he answered. Just lay down here, close your eyes and don't move. I will be very fast, he said.
In a small amount of time he undressed her and raped her. It was fast like he said. Go, clean yourself up, and never tell anyone about this hey. It's our little secret, he said with a smile. She was confused, didn't know what had just happened and like many children, she was good at keeping secrets.
Everyday as she got home from school he raped her, she didn't know what it was or why he didn't to her, she no idea that it was a crime. It was just playing, he made her believe. Until one day he left and it was all over. What is no only a nightmare that haunts her everyday and night because she is now of knowledge that she was sexually molested by her baby sitter at the age of 6 and she never told anyone about it..
Why didn't I know then what I know now, she asks herself everyday.