You and I (Collection of X Reader's !)

Intact | Gamzee x Reader

First story is one I made a while ago! It's a homestuck Gamzee x Reader!

possible trigger warnings: Dissociation , hurt / comfort , bullying mentions.

Hope you enjoy!

-----

It wasn't fair. Not at all. You promised yourself that you would, somehow, get at least three days. Three fucking days was all you wanted, but course your mind must hate you because once again you found yourself slipping in the worst, most atrocious ways.

At first, nothing particular even happened. It seemed the sudden head surges and prickly heat came over you at random. One moment, you were chilling, having a great time, y'know? Next, you're curled into the corner of your bed, pressed against the wooden headboards, with your not-so-comforting blanket and thin sheets pooled around your ankles and feet.

Your head rested against your kneecaps, you began trying to ignore the haunting weights on your body. Focus on your breathing... Stay calm, stay calm...

It felt like you both ran a marathon but also just woke from a month long slumber at the same time. Nothing seemed to actually feel real, like a dense fog washing over your body and captivating your mind. It almost felt like haze. Like you could reach out, press the tips of your fingers to the walls and feel them mold to statis. Like you could hold the fuzz and void in the palm of your hand. Like a slow moving black hole enveloping you.

Of course you know this wouldn't happen. But, well, the mind can do wonders.

Head lifting from your now shaking knees, in the darkness ___ eyes caught glimpse of a laptop among the tides and waves of sheets. You could see the power light was on, blue blinking brightly in contrast to the dark room. You wanted to open it. But, you knew if you did, you'd regret it.

Part of the reason you fell into this head-full state was due to the long-lasting harassment of some shitty old friends. They'd go away at times, but they were always there, lurking low. Watching you. Looking for reasons to yell and torment you.

They always found reasons. They always did, and would go for days messaging you non-stop horrible, horrible things.

'Just get off the internet' you may say.

Hard to get off the internet when thats your only source of social contact.

Though your curtains that effectively blocked out the burning sunlight from outside, it was apparent that it had just fallen below horizon. Once again, you missed out on another day of sleep. Now, night was upon you, and it was time to start stirring despite how bad you longed to seek shelter in your bed.

Like every other time you slipped up, you waited for the fuzz walls and static fog to roll away and bury itself back into the crevice of your mind. Sometimes it took minutes, sometimes hours. Sometimes, when you were at your worst, you found yourself swimming in the darkness of your own mind for days.

This, luckily, was not one of those times.

As you blinked quickly and ruffled your hair, you let out a puffing breath and thanked the heavens you could feel yourself leveling back down to earth. Once you did so, you lazily looked back over your laptop. The light was still blinking, and you stared at the blue glow for a few moments. It seemed calming.

Reaching out, you tugged it closer to you and took a deep breath. You knew that upon opening this, there was a chance that you'd be yet again bombarded with insult and threats. But, then again, Gamzee might be online, and so that was enough to urge you to completely our miniature goal.