song for this chapter is: Control by Halsey
Writing on the wall was my thing when I was younger. I'd write little notes for my parents telling them how much I loved them. I think I knew I was going to be in trouble and I hoped my professions of love would eradicate the chances of a spanking. It never worked. I would still be put in the time out chair. That didn't deter me any at all.
Dad would paint over the writing and childish drawings, only to turn around three days later to find more drawings and notes. I'd imagine my childhood home would still carry the little notes if they were to ever scrape away the layers and layers of caked on paint. I can only imagine how the new owners would react once they reached the actual wall itself.
I wish I could go back to that time where things were so black and white. Now, there is far too much grey.
~
"You live in this house?" I nearly jumped out of my skin as I spun around to see who spoke. A guy sat on the edge of the curb, he was a completely shady looking guy with a scar to match it. It was shaped like a V on his left cheek, the way it curved almost hit the corner of the inner eye. He stood up and I took a wobble back; I was finally out of my cast, but the bruising from it was horrendous. My leg was kept in a brace now, and it caused me to wobble everywhere.
Why the hell is this guy wearing an expensive ass suit and sitting on a dirty ass curb outside of my house. His hair is slicked back, he was terrifyingly tall. The scar made me him all the more imposing.
"Do you live here?" he spoke slowly, drawing out his syllables in a very slow drawl, something that didn't fit with a clear Minnesotan accent. I nodded my head slowly in response. I didn't really want to speak with this man. "So you're Matty's little girl then!" He seemed delighted with this discovery.
"You know my dad?" I felt some tension leave my shoulder at his admission.
A broad grin split hi lips; his scar tissue tugged and the way it did it looked painful. "Yeah Matty and I are real good friends, he and I have a... uh," he paused, " we have a real interesting relationship." A smirk falls onto his face, his blue eyes stared into mine calculatingly.
"I don't think he's mentioned you, can I ask for your name?" I tilted my head to the side as he reached into his suit. I had a vague feeling that I should run.
He pulled his hand out slowly, my heard sped its pace up. It seemed to be trying to claw its way out. I let out a breath of relief when I saw what it was. A card.
Daniel Thomas.
An ordinary name for an unordinary man.
"You do something for me girly?" It was said as a statement, but I knew it was really a demand. I shifted my thigh when something seemed to seize pressure on it. "Tell Matty that I plan to come see him soon. Tell him that Dano plans to see him real soon." I nodded my head and gave him a wary smile.
He said nothing to me in farewell, he just turns and walks off to a black sedan that's parked not to far down the street. His gait is more of a swagger and it strikes me as odd that he walks like something is impeding him from a normal stride. Everything about him just sinks under my skin in a real bad way. I hope I don't see him again any time soon.
~
After the conversation with Mr. Thomas and his request to send my dad a message for him, I decided to bum a ride from Zacky to take me to see my dad. Yes, I admit that the guy got under my skin, but I figured that maybe it would be best that I adhered to his... ahem... request/demand. It was really all up in the air if my dad actually understood what I was there for. I don't know if today is a good day for him.
I really don't want to spend the visit having him yell about him wanting to kill me. That makes things awkward for everyone.
The ride to the psychiatric ward (dad had been transferred to a place better equipped for his violent fits) was quiet. Conversation with Zacky still left much to be desired in the awkward department. Something that I wish wasn't the way it was. I was going to change that.
I angled myself in the seat so I sat sideways; my leg doesn't like to cooperate with me and make my life easier. I have to keep it stretched out straight in Zacky's tiny little muscle car. I don't say anything, I just sit there and study the side of his profile.
He looks happy. Happier than I'd seen my uncle in a long time. The bags under his eyes that had seemed to cling to him before, they're now gone. He'd lost weight even! His pudge was still there, that wasn't going to go away; he'd been working out. That much I could tell. I wish it was Gena that was making him this happy. Not some little bleached-blonde that he'd met at a tattoo shop.
"You're happier." My words seemed to jar him out of whatever land his mind had gone to. A smile tugged gently at his lips. His face seemed to light up the dim car.
"I am, " he agrees. I bite my lower lip in frustration as my brain battle with itself; a part of me was, that's a huge part by the way, angry. The other part of me, that is much smaller, is just ecstatic that he's happy. "I'm not," he pauses to rub a hand along his jaw, "I haven't been this happy in a long time." he concedes finally.
"Do I get to meet my new aunt?" My words sounded bitter even to my ears. I hadn't meant for them to be, it just ended up coming out that way.
Zacky sighs. Loudly. He puts his flashers on and the next thing I know is he's pulling off onto the shoulder. My face must show my confusion because he grabs one of my hands and squeezes in what I'm sure is meant be reassuring. "I don't expect for you to be okay with this, " he admits, " I won't fault you for being angry. I also won't fault you if you honestly hate Meaghan after you meet her, but I don't want whatever is going through your mind right now to change your opinion of me." He squeezes my hand and brings his other up to tap my forehead. "This isn't what I should be saying to you, I'm just to fucking scared to talk to Aleia."
I think back on Aleia's words to me. She isn't the only one unwilling to talk. I guess it runs in the gene pool. I knew how they both felt. I needed to speak with Jimmy without him turning and leaving immediately once the conversation starts. So I can't really fault Zacky. I guess?
"Then whatever is going through your head, tell it to chill the fuck out because Aleia is not going to come to you. Emphasis on the not! Do you understand?" I grip his hand tightly. "While I'm visiting with dad, you can use my phone to talk to her. She probably won't answer if she sees your number."
~
When I was young, I was always running around pretending I was a plane. I wanted to touch the sky! I wanted to touch the clouds with my fingertips. I wanted to sink my fingers into the puffy white mixture and have my feet digging into the vast ocean of blue that sits above our heads.
My dad would pick me up and place me on his shoulders. Then, he was giant to the tiny me. On his shoulders, I would use a stick, just an ordinary stick, and pretend it was a sword. My dad was a dragon and I was his dragon rider. He'd take off running, hands clutching my tiny legs and I would laugh my tiny heart out. We were soaring through the sky! Everything around was a giant beautiful blur!
When I was young, I liked to play pretend. God do I wish that was just one giant game of pretend. Maybe then all of us would still be here.
~
Fun Fact: I read everything in Crystal Reeds voice for this story.
Fun Fact: I am terrified of heights and never want to be a plane or bird as a child.
Not so Fun Fact: Silent reading isn't going to get you more chapters; I love when you vote and comment. It makes me happy. Comment more, and the next chapter will be published. Until then, this book is entirely in your hands on whether or not it is finished.
