Vivid (BoyxBoy) {Pipe Dream: Book I}

Chapter Twenty: Rupture Reality

A/N: The song is Garden of Imperfections (ft. Q'Aila) by Miro

I quite like the song...and i guess it sort of fits...?

Anywho, I'm still drowning in assignments but i had a moment of 'must need to write this before i forget it' and yeah completely ignore the impending due dates like always...which i'm going to regret later but I'm not going to regret writing, it's who I am at the end of the day XD

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Chapter Twenty: Rupture Reality

The water cascades down my back as I stare at the tiles in front of me. It felt so good to have a proper shower since forever. But my mind was unable to focus properly. It felt almost like grasping for air.

I was told to clean myself up soon after Doc said that she wanted to contact someone. Then Fenir forces me down towards the showers and shut me in this bathroom. With the orders 'don't do anything funny. Go straight back to my cell, ah blah blah blah'. I think he's slowly starting to warm up to me. He's letting my bathe by myself.

It was only now that my curiosity finally kicked into gear. Who was she going to contact? Were they Suppressors? I mean I saw X with some before. But did that matter anymore? No, it didn't. I had to find them. I had to find Cody and Anne and take them somewhere safe. No matter what it takes. No matter what happens to me.

Where will it be safe?

That inward question stopped my thought process. Where was it 'safe' anymore?

I don't know. What if they're dead? A bloody image flashes in my vision-

I gasp, shaking my head to stop myself from going any deeper.

No. They're fine. I have to get them back. That's it. I'll sort out what happens after when I have them both back. Take a page from Cody's book for once and deal with it when it is the crisis not a possibility of one.

I reach for the touchpad on the wall to stop the water (it took me five minutes to figure out that everything is digitised) with this new conviction. But it's really hard to think that way...My thoughts almost immediately paints the worst possible scenarios. I sigh, looking for the towel while stepping out of the cubicle that was the shower. Finding it on the sink, next to my new clean clothes, I take it to dry my hair. As I pull it down, I came face to face with my reflection and stop.

Even through all the bruises and cuts, I could see my right side covered in black markings. Even the side of my face. I turn my head slightly while leaning in. It cut down my face, across my cheek and even down over my jaw. It travelled along my neck, shoulder and finally to that demonic arm below. I look down at my own hands, instead of my reflection's. The contrast of the flesh on my left and right arms was lost on me. My right arm...

Bile rose to my tongue. It was befitting, a demon's claw. I curl it into a fist. As it did, it convinced me more and more that it was real.

It killed someone. This...was the hand that killed the boy. Everything else paled to that vivid memory. That boy was a weapon. His body was stolen from him and used against his will and I killed him. Instead of finding some way to help him. Cody's words jarred my thoughts 'You're useless'. He was right. I have never been of any help to anyone. I had to rely on Cody, Anne and even Markus. I was never of any help. I was never strong enough to protect my family. At most I could only chase after them. And that wasn't good enough. Not now. Not ever.

I look back up at the me -the pathetic, useless me that stares back with dark brown eyes reflecting my inward emptiness. Bitter anger build up and I didn't stop myself from punching the mirror with as much force as I could muster. The fragmentation cracks across the surface in a spider's web. But I still saw the distorted reflection. I hated myself so much. I could feel the burning tears building up.