Through the eyes of happines

Where it all started

It was September evening and everybody was hyped and excited. Samantha, her boyfriend Nick and their two best friends, Tom and Jay, where heading for a trip around Europe, something that they have been waiting for, for a long time. Tom, Samantha and Nick were together in high school so they have known each other for four years now and Jay was Tom's best friend for the past two years, so that is the story how this group became to be.

Tom comes from a wealthy family, some would call him a spoiled brat, not because of his behavior, but sometimes you see that he is used to get what he wants. Otherwise he is the sweetest guy ever, he is really fun to be around. Then there is Jay, he is a caring and loving, he will always find the way to help you. He would normally make himself suffer if that means that a person he cares about suffers less. He also had issues with depression and anorexia a few years ago, so now he got himself together and lives a normal life. Nick is a special guy, he is different than others and that is why Samantha noticed him. In only two weeks, this two, will have their two years anniversary. And then we have Samantha, she is simple, life-loving person. She sees beauty in everything and will never judge anything which she doesn't know about or doesn't understand.

With each four of them, having a completely different, but all strong personality's they make a perfect match. They know who they really are, and they don't need to hide anything, when these four friend are together, they are young and free.

While Samantha and Tom were taking care of their interrail-train tickets, Jay and Nick went out to smoke one joint before hitting the road. It was nothing unusual, every single one of the boys smoked occasionally, so Samantha did too, but only when she was in the mood (but that didn't happen often). And after a minutes they took off, first stop was Barcelona, Spain, they had a 24 hours train ride to get there. Nick fell asleep as soon as they settled in their cabin, due to lots and lots of weed that day.

The other three were awake and talking about their trip and how full of adventures it will be. While suddenly Tom and Jay announced that it is time for some ecstasy, and again it was not a shock for her, because she knew that they have taken the pills couple of times before, she didn't judge them, but was still worried about them. She got an offer, again, as many times before, but as usual, she declined. Nor she or Nick have done that, this two considered themselves as 'still-pure' when it came to drugs. But Tom and Jay intentionally left a half of this yellow-colored pill on Samantha's side of the table, just in case she would change her mind.

They were talking about the effects of the pill and everything sounded so innocent to Samantha. It was the first time that she has actually started thinking about it from different point of view, instead of automatically making a grumpy face and saying no she was actually eager to know more about it. She has seen the boys under the ecstasy effect, and she admits that it wasn't what she expected. She thought that people start talking nonsense, starts to be all messy and uncontrollable. But no, it wasn't like that. People were normal, at least these two, they just had more energy, was more emotional and they were fun to watch.

Samantha always wondered what is going on in your head, when you take the pill, and every time she asked someone, they told her that it is unexplainable if you haven't experienced it. Everybody has a different feeling.

After two hours that she has spend looking and thinking about yellow pill, she decided that that's a non sense and agrees to not take the pill. The train had 1 hour stop, and it was in the middle of the night so they had to wait at the train station. Tom and Jay where outside, so she joined them and started to ask questions about ecstasy: when do you start to feel the effect? And if is there is a chance of anxiety? After a few minutes she told the boys she needed to go to the bathroom so she headed back to the train where Nick was still sleeping.

She took the pill in her hands and asked him what he thinks, He didn't want to say anything, because he wasn't that type of guy, that would limited her. After a few minutes of constant nagging and monologues she remembered the last time she was out with her girl-best friend, Natalie. Samantha and Nathalie go way back, since they were twelve, and they tell each other everything there is to tell, even the most intimate secrets.

One night Samantha went out with her and her friends, she was the only one drinking alcohol, and it felt so weird being the only one. She admits she felt pressure, even though nobody said anything to her, she felt shivers down her spine. And back about Natalie, she has never taken a drug before, until that night.

So while Samantha was on the train, in her cabin, with her boyfriend and a pill in her hand, the one thing she was thinking of was Natalie's calm reaction while the pill slid down her throat. She didn't make a big deal out of it so Samantha wondered why she would.

A few seconds, after she took the pill, she was so scared that she became ice cold and started to feel this strange pain in her chest, something like regret, and she instinctively wanted to cry. Nick was watching her the whole time, but didn't say a thing until he hugged her and said: "It's going to be alright babe. " But those weren't the words she wanted to hear. She knew that there was turning back, so she got herself together and went out to hang out with the boys.

Samantha did not tell the two of boys about occurrence on the train for a long time. After twenty minutes she asked them again, how much time the drug needs, before you feel the effect. Their answer was after about half an hour. She replayed with simply saying: "That's good, it will start soon!'' Tom and Jay looked at her with the biggest eyes the world has ever seen. At first they were just surprised and they were excited and proud of her for doing that, so they stared to hug her and saying how happy they are for her starting this journey.

All she could think of was how can a person be so satisfied after hearing that a friend took a drug, she didn't understand what was so great about it, only thing she felt was disgrace for doing that. Samantha told herself that there is nothing to feel proud of. When Tom and Jay noticed that she is not feeling enthusiastic, as they where, they may have made a mistake when encouraging her to do that.

Tom came to her, hugged her the hardest he could and said: "I know it's hard when a person crosses this line, it's not just about the drug, it's also about what kind of a person you thought you where before taking it. I mean tell me about it, I have been there too. But Sam I swear it is going to be just fine, you have the three of us here and we will make it beautiful for you, you'll see. Just trust me on this, ok? ''

She began to feel calmer and after a few second she was starting to feel something unsual...