Dear journal, this is my first intree for this. So please be forgiving. This weekend was kinda crazy.... I went to two friends houses and to one of their church's, witch was Mormon. They gave me a Book of Mormon and a pan-flit about what's its about. I like Mormonism and all but I'm not sure if it fits me. After church I went home with dad Haley and the boys, that was alright, even though the boys were pains in the ass. Directly after we got home we left for grandmas. I had headphones on so it didn't bother me as much. When we finally got to Chesapeake I was feeling a little weird, like something was in my chest. The feeling didn't go away even after listening to music, witch usually helped, nothing worked. I was starting to freak out, witch was bad considering all the people in the room. The pizza man saved me. He distracted everyone from the stress I was admitting. I knew I only had a little bit longer before my anxiety became unbearable. I still held it in the best I could. I felt the lump in my chest get bigger, the panic set in. The world turned black, a tariffing darkness I couldn't handle anymore. I went to a lightless room and cried. I cried like someone I loved died. I felt this huge amount of sadness crawl out the pits of my soul into my heart. I felt so many emotions at once I didn't think my body could stand it. I felt sick to my stomach. My blood was boiling under my skin. My breath left my body to find someone better. I was completely alone.
