Retrouvailles

Chapter Four

Fed up with sitting in the kitchen, Ashe grabbed his phone and plopped down onto his couch. His eyes roamed the small screen and noticed the day displayed on the calendar. Today was his thirty third birthday.

"I am incredibly old." Ashe pronounced. Not to anyone in particular. Mostly just to speak. As the bright screen illuminated his face he thought back to one of his best birthday memories.

"Ashe! Ashe wake up! The apartment is on fire!" Simon yelled into his ear.

Ashe bolted up out of the bed, half asleep, and fell onto the floor, taking some of the sheets with him.

"Just kidding," Simon picked him up and plopped him at their dining table.

"Happy twenty first birthday!"

Ashe was still dazed, and slightly cross at the fact of being screamed awake. But the sight in front of him cheered him up. Coffee, crepes, and assorted jams were laid out on the table in front of him.

"Oh, Simon. I despise you so much. You know I'm trying to keep my thin figure." Ashe protested as he grabbed a crepe and spread some strawberry jam onto it, promptly shoving it into his mouth.

"Oh of course you do. That is why you've eaten three already."

Ashe spoke through a mouthful of crepes. "Shush."

Simon chuckled and took a few before Ashe devoured them all. He smiled when Ashe leaned back in the chair and smiled at him, a bit of jam on his cheek.

"That was so wonderful. Best present ever, thank you." Simon grabbed a cloth and gently wiped away the jam.

"You are very welcome. However the day has just begun, ma chérie. There is plenty more in store for you today."

Ashe blinked as Simon began cleaning up. "Are you being serious? You don't have to do that."

Simon just shrugged as he washed and cleaned up the kitchen.

"Oui, I do not have to. But mon cher I want to. Just let me splurge on you today."

Ashe knew that anything Simon wanted to do, he'd do it. Even if Ashe said no.

"Alright. I'll give in for today."

Simon nodded and came over to him. "Good. Now, amour, what would you like to do today?"

Ashe wasn't one to ask things of others, so when it came to questions like that he had no idea how to respond.

"Well, I suppose I've never been to the Eiffel Tower." Simon gave him a look and sat down next to him.

"Really, amour? The Eiffel Tower? That is what everyone wants to do when they come here. You don't have anything else you'd want to do?"

Ashe simply shrugged and shook his head. "Not really. I mean, I had planned on visiting 2 years ago but. You know how that turned out."

Simon rolled his eyes at him. "Very funny. Are you sure this is what you want to do?"

Ashe nodded and Simon sighed. "Well, I suppose it is your birthday, non?"

Ashe was terribly excited. After roaming the streets with Simon until dark, they had finally begun the long awaited trip to the top of the Eiffel tower. Since it was so late and very cold outside, not many people were visiting along with them.

As the elevator doors opened, they revealed one of the most stunning sights Ashe had ever seen in his entire life. He slowly walked to the railing, unaware of the admiration in Simon's eyes. He looked out over the entire city of Paris. The lights dazzled over his pale skin, illuminating it in contrast to the black sky above him.

As he continued marveling at the scene before him, Simon held him by his waist and pulled him close.

"What do you think mon cher?" Ashe glanced at him quickly and continued gazing out at the beauty before him.

"It's wonderful. Absolutely wonderful" Ash breathed. He watched as it clouded before him in the freezing air.

This moment was perfect. This view was perfect. France was perfect. Simon was perfect. Everything was perfect. Before Ashe knew it they had closed down the tower and he was walking hand in hand with Simon back to their apartment.

He was so overwhelmed with that amazing view that he became dazed until Simon brushed his bangs out of his face.

"I hope it was what you wished for." Simon chuckled as Ashe nodded enthusiastically.

In the three years that Ashe has spent living with Simon, they've certainly grown so close. And even though this day was perfect, there was something missing that he couldn't quite put his finger on. The more he thought about it, the stranger he began to feel. Then, it hit him suddenly. Even though he and Simon had been dating for the past three years, he had never intimately expressed his love. They had never even kissed. A hug or two every now and then, besides a kiss on the cheek, is all that Simon had ever shown. Why was Ashe thinking it as such a big deal now.

He suddenly felt ill. Was it because Ashe was not a woman? Was it hard for Simon to love him because of that reason? Did Simon even love him at all, or was he just acting on a whim all those years ago and took too much pity to end it?

All of those condescending thoughts rushing through Ash's mind caused his emotions to show. A small tear ran down his cheek and a muffled cry escaped his lips. This caused Simon to immediately stop what he was doing and come to him.

"Ashe, mon amour is something wrong? Are you hurt?"

Ashe couldn't help but feel shame. He covered his face to hide from himself, to block out the pain he had caused. Simon gently pulled him into an embrace and rubbed his back until the dying gasps slowly stopped.

"Mon cher will you please tell me what's going on? Whatever's bothering you I'm sure it will all be fine." Simon was trying to be as reassuring as possible, but it only made Ashe feel worse.

He dried his eyes with his sleeve and kept his gaze low. "I suppose I was just thinking a bit too much" He lied.

Although Simon didn't buy it, he didn't want to upset him anymore than he already was. "Alright then. Why don't we get you to bed, you've had a busy day"

Ashe nodded "Yeah" Simon held his hand and lead him to their room.

The dim lighting from the hallway cast shadows over the walls, making them seem alive. After Ashe changed and crawled under the covers, Simon got on his knees in front of the bed and gently kissed his hand.

"Bonne nuit, mon amour." Ashe smiled lightly and looked into his eyes.

"Good night, Simon. Thank you for everything today." Simon ran a hand through Ashe's hair and leaned down, pecked his cheek and stood up.

"It was my pleasure. Now get some rest."

He walked over to the door and was about to shut it when Ashe piped up.

"Simon?"

He stopped abruptly and popped his head back in.

"Oui?"

Ashe took a shaky breath and uttered three small words with such great meaning that neither of them had said before.

"I love you."

Simon blinked at him and for a split second Ashe thought back to a few minutes before, and how devastated he would be if he didn't say it back. After a few long seconds, Simon finally responded.

"Je 'taime, Ashe."