*this story is about eating disorders, and the awful things they do. In no way am I encouraging it, and if you feel like this could trigger you please leave. I hope anyone with an eating disorder will try to get help, and maybe this will help people see the reality of these diseases.*
I don't know exactly when it started. Maybe the beginning of middle school. I'd always been a bit chubby. Neglecting it my whole life, up until now of course. I guess it began as just wanting to be healthier, I wasn't skinny to begin with, maybe a few pounds over weight, but I wanted to be healthy. I even wanted to be curvy. But no, I had lumps, not curves.
A friend of mine, curvy girl, I sat with at lunch some time in middle school, she never ate lunch. I never thought much of it, maybe she just wasn't hungry, maybe she forgot her lunch, maybe she couldn't afford it.
By the end of the year I had a thought. My dietary plans weren't working out for me, I just sort of gave up trying to be healthier whenever I was faced with food. So I thought to myself. My friend is curvy- she doesn't eat lunch. Maybe that's the secret.
Needless to say I spent my entire middle school expirience, trying not to eat lunch. This only caused me to be starving when I came home, and then eat my lunch portion and dinner. Eating all this so close together- caused weight gain and allowed my stomach to stretch. I didn't get full as fast any more.
By the time of my freshman year, my friend had moved away and all the other girls we sat with had started being mean to me and to everyone else, really. There wasn't alot of comments about my weight, I can't blame them for this. But then again I can't blame anyone but myself.
So as you can guess my freshman year, I was alone, depressed, overweight. Any awful thing you could think of. Now I'm in my sophomore year and I'd like to say I've lost some weight. Quite recently. I am still a bit over weight, but that should be changing soon.
*just a short little intro*
