Led By Your Beating Heart [L.S AU]

15

"Can I be honest," Sara asks, on their last pap walk together. She licks the frozen yoghurt off her spoon and leans forward. "I actually don't understand why you agreed to this stunt in the first place."

Harry sucks at his own spoon. "You don't?" he asks. "It's cause I almost outed myself on--"

"--that radio show, yeah," she interrupts, waving a hand around. "I remember."

"That's the reason," Harry says.

She tilts her head, narrowing her eyes at him. "It's kind of a shit reason," she says bluntly.

Harry's quite confused. "What?"

"It's a shit reason," she repeats calmly. "And a PR stunt of this level for that is actually sort of a useless move."

"What?"

"Okay, look," she says. "We all heard about that radio thing. I heard it, lots of people heard it, it was a big thing. It was on tabloids everywhere."

"Yeah," Harry says. He remembers The Sun's cringe-worthy headline, at least.

"But did you actually look at what people were saying about it?" She asks. "Or did you just listen to what your team told you?"

Harry....didn't, actually. He looks down at his frozen yoghurt.

"There was actually a lot of support," she continues, when Harry doesn't answer. Her voice is kind.

Harry's eyes snap to her face. "Really?" he asks.

"Yeah," she answers, a small smile on her lips. "It was overwhelming, actually. Twitter was full of tweets of your fans saying that they love you, and they'll support you, no matter what."

Harry can't believe he missed this. "Really?" He asks again, just to be sure.

Sara laughs. "Really," she confirms. "Which is why when you agreed to this, I was a bit confused. Because, I thought you were just going to own it and come out. The response was already incredibly positive, anyway."

Harry blinks at her.

"I don't know," she shrugs. "I thought you could've done it, especially since you were very open about it with me. And I thought maybe you were scared of putting yourself out there, for the rest of the world to see."

Currently, when he thinks about it, there is probably nothing that Harry wants more.

"Wait," he says slowly. "Let me just. You're saying that, after the entire radio thing, I could've come out, and nobody would've batted an eyelash?"

"Well, not nobody," Sara says. "But people were generally very supportive."

"I wouldn't have made my band lose pre-orders?" Harry asks. He doesn't really know why he's asking her. What does she know about albums and pre-orders? She's a model.

"I think you would've probably gotten a sales boost," she says. "If you saw the trending topics, God."

Harry can't imagine. He really can't wrap his head around it.

"I don't have any saved, though," Sara says, frowning. "But it's probably somewhere in the internet, if you search for it. In case you don't believe me."

"No, I," Harry manages to get out. His head is swimming with so many thoughts, of being free, of being open, of finally being able to be himself in public. Of being able to talk without restraint, being able to say things he had to stop himself from saying, before.

And of course, Louis. Being able to hold Louis' hand in public, being able to gush about him to anyone who's willing to listen, being able to take him out on dates. On public dates.

He'd thought at first that he just wanted to be free of PR romances and silly tabloid stories. Now, though, he knows that's just not it.

He wants to be himself.

Sara scoops the last of her frozen yoghurt and pops it into her mouth elegantly, mindful of the cameras still trained on them.

"Look," she says, "it's alright if you still don't want to come out. I was just curious." She drops the plastic spoon into her empty carton.

"No," Harry finds himself saying. "No, it's alright." He pauses. "But I think I'm going to do it."

Sara smiles at him, a small, knowing, smile. "Well, then," she says. "The very best of luck to you, Harry Styles."

She stands up to leave and Harry follows her, walking out the door. The paparazzi snap photos of them as they walk.

Sara pulls him into a hug. "I'll be rooting for you," she says into his ear.

Harry laughs. "Thank you." He pauses. "I hope you find someone who makes you as happy as he makes me."

"I do too," she answers, before pulling away. "Try to come visit Portugal one time, eh? I'll show you around. Bring your him too, if you want."

"I'll try," he answers. Portugal does seem lovely.

She studies him for a moment. "Take care of yourself," she finally says, her voice gentle. "I'll see you around."

And then she's walking away from him, towards her own car, and that's it. That's it for their PR relationship.

By next week, the tabloids will be reporting break-up rumours--not that they were ever confirmed to be together in the first place--and then a few days later, a 'source' will confirm that they've split. Then their teams will simply ignore the story, until it's completely forgotten by the general public. Harry's been in enough PR relationships to know the process.

He walks towards his car, gets in, and drives.