Sad stories

Remember

{Before}

I looked down at the razor, not knowing what to do. I looked back at myself in the mirror and seen my blue eyes go to an blue to a bright green from all the crying I had been doing. I was only wearing my under garments. I had my music blasting from the huge speakers I had in my room. I locked myself in my room, knowing I was home alone. I was just scared someone would've came home and found me doing what I was thinking of doing.

"Love me like you do"

by Ellie Goulding started to play. I looked over at the pictures of us plastered all over the part of my room. I looked at one of the pictures and seen us kissing. I felt tears fall from my eyes and I looked back down at the razor. I grabbed the razor in my right hand and looked down at my stomach. I didn't want to do it on my arms or legs because I know people would of see them. I chose my stomach because I knew you used to love that part of my body and I hated looking at it. I grabbed the razor tightly in my hand making my fingers bleed.

I looked down at the blood dripping from my fingers and I didn't feel a thing. I toke a deep sigh and started to slice my stomach. I spelled your name. I spelled it the best I can, I looked at myself in the mirror seeing the blood fall from the letters. I heard Ellie Goulding sing,

"Love me like you do! L-l-l-love me like you do!! Touch me like you do! T-t-touch me like you do!"

I felt my body go numb and I walked over grabbing a red Dry and erase marker. I went to a blank wall and wrote these words

"I have no business here.."

And looked at the bloody marker. I looked at the red hand I had and just did a hand print like I was finger painting on my wall. I did my signature making sure whoever seen this. Knew who I was. I grabbed the razor again and started to slice my face over and over again. I felt the pain go through my body, but I didn't longer care. I let the tears fall into the cuts and I stopped, taking a deep breath trying to hold in the pain. I felt the salt from my tears burn the blood inside my skin.

I looked at myself in the mirror and saw cuts all over my face and stomach. I felt anger go through me and I started to search for scissors. I found them, I looked at my self and started to cut the long hair I had off. I cut it so short I looked like a guy with flippy hair. I cut it from varies of places and I put the scissors down and stared at myself again in the mirror.

"NO!"

I screamed and punched the mirror making it shatter all over the place. I looked at my hands which was full of blood and I seen a huge piece of my shattered mirror. I saw your signature written on it. I grabbed it seeing the reflection of my hideous face and I toke a deep breath sitting down on the glass.

I grabbed the sharp long glass in my hand and shoved it in my stomach. I yelled in pain and laid down with the mirror piece still in my stomach. I looked out at the window and seen the sunlight beam down on my face. I closed my eyes and a million of questions popped into my head which I couldn't asked before.

Why did you hurt me?

Did you actually love me?

Was I just a toy?

Was all the things you told me, were they just all lies?

Am I actually beautiful like you said?

Is there something wrong with me?

Wasn't I the one?

What did I do wrong?

Am I not to pretty for you?

Can't you ever love me?

Can you tell me this is all a prank and pretend none of this had ever happened?