Phone

I just stared at my phone.

I had just sent a text to someone very dear to me. I'm just waiting for the response.

This person is my very special brother.We grew up together and moved out together. He liked the suburbs and I loved the city, but visited each other once a month and spent vacation time together.

He's my special person.

I know it's wrong to feel this way about your older brother, but I can't help it. He's always been there for me and he's the closest person I can confide myself in. He's always there for me.

I never was the popular one. I may like the hustle and bustle of the city, but I never was a social butterfly. That was my brother. He could draw crowds to him like moths to a flame. I still remember how most of my friends that I have now are through him. Truth be told, if he ever left, I think they would too.

Over the years, him and I have grown nearly inseparable. Our parents died a few years back, but we help each other to get over it. I know they loved us, but I didn't care much for them. The only one I could see is my brother.

I hated when he got his first girlfriend. He was so excited, but so nervous. I felt immense envy of the girl, but I wasn't an idiot. I would never let brother know about my feelings. I feigned happiness for him and even teased him, saying she'll have to pass my tests first to be worthy. She would never have been worthy. No woman is worthy.

He is perfect.

No matter if she can cook like a five-star chef, clean like a machine or pop out kids like a bunny. Heck she could do all of the above and still not be worthy. No one is worthy except for me.

Brother is meant for me.

But, I have to let him be taken by girls so no one can persecute him. I'm sure if I told him how much I loved him, more than a brother, he would feel the same too.

I can never forget the day he came home talking about this girl from college. He was almost as ecstatic as his first girlfriend, if not more so. I hated her already. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach from when he first mentioned her. I ignored it, dismissing it as an illness at the time.

I was wrong. So. Very. Wrong.

He kept talking about her, texting her, calling her, Skyping her. It drove me mad! He hardly paid attention to me and I loathed her for it. That tramp stole my most beloved. He brought her home for me to meet and I almost laughed when I saw her.

I knew brother loved me. He chose a girl who was basically the female version of me. Same height, same hair colour and length, same eyes. Even down to the severity of freckles and dimples. He found a carbon copy of me in a female. He jokingly said that I may have been adopted and was her long lost twin.

The encounter was extremely laughable. I wanted to tell brother he didn't have to go that far to look for a copy of me. Just take the real deal. I adored brother all the more.

Until he told me he was buying a ring for her. They had been dating for about two and a half years now and he thought he was ready to marry her. The tramp was stealing him from me for good.

He didn't keep up with his turn to visit monthly and I never knew when he took vacation so we can take it the same time. I was breaking down. My precious brother was being stolen.

He was stolen...

Years passed.

I sent him a text every night.

I never visited. I couldn't. I didn't belong to a place where my clone stole my beloved and birth my children for brother.

Every couple nights, he responded back, but slowly they died down until they stopped completely.

During one text - I can't remember how recent or not - he told me he had some kind of disease. They said it was 'catastrophic to his neural system and he had a few weeks left'. I guess they meant he could leave the hospital in a few weeks, because I don't know what the rest meant.

This was a while ago. Maybe a few months? He hasn't responded to my texts in a while.

Maybe I can pass by tomorrow by his house to see if he's there yet.

Maybe he'll text back tonight.

I'll just watch my phone, in case.

I just stared at my phone.