Not going to give up

Wrong choices

>Rin's POV<

Sick. I was sick and was dying, still I battled against death, not wanting to give up and admit defeat. What is wrong with me you ask, I'm sick, sick of heart, my heart cannot take anything anymore it's been through so much that it's started to shut down, sometimes I just like to shut my emotions, my brain, and my heart, I'll put on a fake smile and continue on, nobody ever notices all they think of me is what a monster, demon, weird creature i am. Everyone, even my own brother hates me, the only ones that actually accept me are Mephisto, Amaimon, and Shura, and that's because Mephisto and Amaimon are also my half-brothers. 

I walked towards the bathroom, in Yukio's and my dorm, and got out my razor pulling up the sleeves of my shirt. Now a days i always wore either a hoodie or shirts that are long sleeved. I put the razor to my already scarred arm and made five more cuts in each arm, I watched my blood drip into the sink with tears in my eyes, I had done this for over two months now, it made me feel better in a way, it made me feel pain allowing me to forget my problems for the time being. My cuts healed at first but since like a month ago I started to just heal at a normal human's rate, i wasn't able to heal faster now, I think i strained my power too much or something.

"Rin, where are you?" I heard Bon yell, I was surprised that Bon came here. I instantly washed the sink putting the razor in my blue jeans, I turned to see if the door was locked and noticed it didn't even had a lock. 'Fuck what now and just my fucking luck to be wearing a white long sleeved shirt, well I have at least three minutes before the blood is noticeable, maybe five since the shirt fits me big' I thought. Just when i covered my arms Bon came in. "Hey Rin, sorry to come so suddenly, but I wanted to know if you'd come with me, we need to escape, the vatican now thinks they should exterminate you, the others are trying to convince them otherwise, come on i don't have time to explain now i'll tell you in the way" Bon advanced towards me and grabbed my arm, I winced and yelp in pain, Bon looked at me statled then to his hand which was now covered in my blood.

"Rin what did you do?" he whispered pulling up my sleeves exposing all my previous cuts and the new ones. I was starting to feel dizzy from blood loss and stumbled a little, Bon catch me and said almost yelling, "Rin why did you do this? you could die you know that" I looked at him and tried to push him away but he just sat me down and started to attend to my wounds in a hurry. "Why wou...would you care I'm just a worthless monster that shouldn't exist." Bon looked at me with a determined look and said,"I care and I promise i will not let anything happen to you, now let's go i'll tend to your cuts more properly when we're out of here." I tried to stand up but couldn't, I became even more dizzy so Bon had to carry me on his back. I soon lost conciousness.