Fucked up stories

Turtle

Once there was a turtle who wrote a paragraph that was longer then the Mississippi oatmeal cake factory. He liked cow poop and eating the booty like groceries. Sometimes when he was feeling lonely he called 911 to find a wife. He also made out with pigs and fucked em right in the pussy. One time he raped a butterfly. It usually smelled like shit and strawberries. His dog, cat, and leprechaun spent 3 years in the coke factory until the cops showed up trying to shut them down. They used their tvs and flew away. His sister had stolen something from the leprechauns acorn and shoved her phone into her fat ass but later she placed unicorns into a jar and shook them. It was later on they met the lamas at walmart. Their names were Carl and Paul. They wore tank tops, and hats over their underwear. Carl liked killing mutated people that were part dragon and ate human faces. Turtle shells are stupid. This has exploded into a hot mess of turtle guts. If Mr. Flufferman slept with a beaver that farted a rainbow of dragons. People would believe he was seriously on crack. And that was our twisted story.

The end

I don't care about grammar so fuck off if you have any rude comments this is a story that can make people laugh. Plus I did warn you to read at your own risk