Welcome To My Disasterland.

Here we go again.

The day after I got out of the hospital, Christina decided to put me in therapy. Again. She thinks that sending me into a room with someone I don't like will help me. I'm the suffer in silence type. I believe that my feelings don't matter, therefore, I sit and shrug my shoulders for the entire hour.

A week after therapy and my hospital release, I went back to the school. It was spring, yet I was still wearing sweaters and long sleeves. I still had the gauze over my wrists due to how deep the cuts were this time. Everyone assumed why I had missed two weeks of school. They all knew how crazy I was. I think it's quite funny actually, if someone tries to kill themselves and they fail, they are automatically a crazy attention seeking bitch, but if some tried and actually dies, everyone loves them. With that last statement I'm sure you can imagine that I am not very well liked in school. I am known as that one crazy girl. Or "that girl" for the matter. I don't have friends. I have my headphones and my iPod. That's about it.

School for me was just like any other bullied teenager except no one did anything to help me and everyone was against me. The jocks, the rockers, the drama kids, the popular and pretty girls, the "emos"...just everyone had something against me. Most of them say they do, but just hate me because everyone else does. Today was just like any other day except I was slightly zoned from my pain medication, which I loved, by the way. It let me push things away. Anyway, it started like a normal day. I walked in through the double doors and avoided all eye contact as I walked straight to my locker. I had one headphone in praying no one would say anything to me until later. Sure enough, the prettiest, most popular girl in school, Ribbon, and her star football running back boyfriend, Danny, walk past me. I glance out of the corner of my eye. When she caught my glance she yelled.

"Look everyone! The suicidal attention whore has returned! You'd think after like, what, twenty times she'd get it right, huh?"

By the time her last word left her lips she was chuckling. Danny looked at me with a look I didn't understand, then wrapped his arm around Ribbon and whispered something into her ear. She smiled, then turned around. By this point, I was already planning my next suicide, and this time..this time it was going to work. It was going to work and I would be gone for good.