Sorry (Just One Step)

Just one step.

One step, and all would end. The blood would stop coursing through his veins, the heart beating inside him would stop. The air would leave his lungs. He would end.

Was he ready? To see what would happen after death, finally? It was with that question he realized he was trembling, his breath shaky. He knew inside him he was done, the world had had its share of picking Brian Quinn piece by piece. He was drained, there was nothing more left for him in the world. He had saved. He had lost. But now his time was up.

He wondered how his closest friends would react. With a deep sigh, he peeked over the edge.

Gatto, the one who had been through so much and remained so strong. The one who never gave up on life and never became jaded. He was so admirable, part of Quinn looked up to his friend as a hero to be revered. He always beat himself up for never being as strong. I'm sorry, Joey.

Murray, the one who was smiling all the time and always remained positive. He always inspired Quinn to look at the good in life and focus on it. There was no changing the past and everyone had to live with it, there was no time to be sad. I'm sorry, James.

Vulcano, the one who kept him from doing what he was just about to do all those years ago. The one who always made him smile when he really never wanted to. The one who looked Quinn in the eyes and said it was good to hear him laugh again. I'm sorry, Sal.

It was easy to get to the roof of one of the buildings near his neighborhood. It was easy to stand on the edge and peer down at fate. It was New York, people were too busy to look up and focus on a single man. He found himself thinking about the woman at the front desk. Would she get fired for letting him through to the elevators? He found himself apologizing to her as well.

A sob bubbled from the broken man. He knew it was time but yet he felt like it came too fast. But there was no going back, no changing the past. He had to live with everything he had done.

"I'm so sorry."

He took just one step.