"Bartholemew, oh bartholemew where art thou barty!"
Gurtrude received no reply and she giggled then said,
"FOR FUCK SAKE BART WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU! GERMANY?!"
He said "no"
She said "where are you "
He said "in your ass"
"GET THE FUCK OUT ITS REALLY SORE"
He screamed and ran up the walls and said "THATS WHAT SHE SAID!"
Gurtrude said "yes she fu king did"
They walked to the bathroom and gurtrude ran a hot soapy bath, "oh gurty are you feeling flirty?" Gurtrude said nothing and just filled the bath with soap and hot water "strip" said gurtrude... Bartholemew began to cry and slowly take off his clothes... Gurtrude pulled him over to the bath and started playing with his hair, she proceed to make a fist with his hair in her hand and shove his face into the roasting water "AGAHAHAHAHAHS TONIGHT WE FEAST ON BARTHOLMEW!!!" (Readers note: girtrude is a crazy mofo) bartholemew stops breathing and untenses his muscles girtrude was so happy cuz she could now check his phone to see what hoes he was texting "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!18 CHATS BARTHOLMEW IM GONNA KICK YOUR FUCKING THROAT!"she kicked him in the head "Patricia, keisha, rolanda, mo'nique!" She checked out the girls profiles and scanned their faces, Oh well she thought "better go hang with the girlies and unwind..." She pulled out her phone and made a group chat
Members : Patricia, keisha, rolanda and mo'nique
Gurtrude: girls omg we have to go to the club!
Patricia, keisha and rolanda: omg yYASSSSSSSS
Mo'nique: sure thang babe
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Hey guys sorry if this was crappy I'm used to writing story's with my friends so there's less writing to do but please tell me what you want my characters to be called in chapter two, this book is gonna be like kinda little short stories
See ya later sk8r!!!!!!!!
YOU ARE READING
Is the kitchen on fire?
HumorGertrude heard bartholemew singing, "This song is on fire!" She turned round to see bartholemew had burnt the house down
