The Cold Road (Book 1)

Chapter Nine

The snow had finished falling by the time James reached the doors of the Iron Feather Inn. Around him, noise filled the quiet streets as the preschool held at the church across the street rang its bell for lunch, releasing its inmates for their short break. James paused at the doors, turning away from them to look out over the town. Lindsey was supposed to have been in school. He wondered how many of her friends were missing her, whether they were asking about her, and whether her teachers knew what to say to those questions.

'Stop right there, James Holland! If you take one more step I will shoot,' a very pretty, and very determined voice threatened him from behind.

James froze, his hand swinging close to the holster on his belt. He recognised the voice. How could he not. He had lived with it for years. He turned, slowly, wondering whether she really had a gun. Cindy Carelton stood facing him, hands splayed open and empty. A small smile played at her lips as she shrugged.

'You didn't really think I'd have a gun, or pull it out on you, did you? she asked sarcastically.

'No,' he replied, releasing a small sigh. 'I can't say I did.'

They stared at each other quietly, each taking in the other. Then, without warning, Cindy was next to James, gripping him in a tight bear hug. He staggered back, blown away in surprise. Instinctively he hugged her back and they stood there in the cool breeze together.

They broke away and Cindy stared up at him. 'You always had beautiful eyes,' she said.

James offered a weak chuckle. His legs felt weak. Why was she not yelling? 'Mine are plain,' he said. 'You have the nice ones. No one else I have ever met has gold in their iris.'

She smiled at him, and he turned away. He couldn't look at her. Shame? Probably.

'I missed you, you know?' she said, still staring up at him as he looked gravely at the ground.

'Why are you not angry at me? Things...' he licked his lips nervously. 'We didn't pass on the best terms. You shouldn't have missed me. I thought you were going to yell at me when we met.'

'Is that why you shied from seeing me? Why you ran back at the Inn?'

'I don't want to be here,' he confided. 'Of all the places I dreamed of being positioned, never once did Damascus enter my mind. I thought maybe it might have become a better place, but it hasn't changed. I was hoping I could just sidle along as if nothing ever happened here.'

'So do you want me to go?'

He shook his head. 'No, no. If you go this will never be sorted, and I don't like leaving things undone.'

She laughed ruefully. 'You were more than happy to leave it undone before by not seeing me.'

'I hated it,' he lied. 'I wanted it over, completely sorted out between us. I just didn't want it to happen so soon.

'I don't hate you for leaving. I understand why you left Damascus.'

'What about why I wanted to leave you? I know it's not easy, or it can't have been at the time. How do you feel now?' asked James, staring at her wistfully. Could she understand?

Cindy sighed, kicking out at a small patch of snow on the side of the footpath. 'I've moved on. I missed your company when you were in New York, and it took me a while to come to terms with the fact that we parted and would not be getting back together again. I suppose you didn't think of me while you were away?'

Turning, James walked back out to the road in silence. The world was quieter now, as if the town was holding its breath while the two of them talked. Across the road he could see the pre-schoolers, charging around the small yard of the church. Tired, weary teachers watched. He threw his mind back to the months that had passed between now and when he had split up with Cindy. He had spent so long trying to forget that day that there was nothing left any more. There was a memory of the girl, of course, she had made an impact, but he could not honestly say he had thought about her. He shook his head.