She was tired. She wanted nothing more than to be in his room again, to be curled up on his bedroom floor with his blanket over her body and his body pressed against hers as she slept.
But no. There Gee was, crying on the bathroom floor, her back pressed up to the door instead of Frank's chest. She was exhausted. She was exhausted from the crying, from the screaming while she curled up on her side, exhausted from her mind. She could feel every memory of Frank turn sour, every thought of him twist and turn into something awful. When Gee thought of Frank's name, she no longer found joy and softness there. She found something cold and hard, something unpleasant. What had she done wrong? Why did Frank do this so suddenly? Was she not enough?
She could feel her body bleeding. Maybe not on the outside, but on the inside she was burnjng and bleeding at the same time, flames stuck in her chest and begging to come out. Something was ripped out of her and she knew that she would bleed to death on that dirty bathroom floor. She was going to bleed to death and all she could do was cry silently and grab at her embarrassingly flat chest, wishing she could scratch the pain away. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe her chest was the issue. Maybe she wasn't girl enough for him. Maybe he wanted more than just a flat chest and some makeup and a skirt. Maybe he wanted someone like Lindsey or Jamia. Someone that was a real girl. She couldn't blame him. She couldn't stand to look at her own body, so how could he?
"Gee?" She jumped at the sound of her name coming from the other side of the bathroom door. She scrambled to her knees, shakily bringing the collar of her shirt to her eyes and nose, wiping them as dry as possible.
"What?" She replied quickly and sharply, her voice raw and her throat aching. She could hear the Lindsey try to come in. The doorknob wiggled and Gee launched herself at it, making sure it was locked. Lindsey couldn't come in and see her like this.
"Don't come in. Please." Gee pleaded, her body limp as she hung on the doorknob. Her eyes were squeezed shut and her head was hung between her skinny arms. That little amount of movement pushed her over the edge; she was going to pass out if she stood up. There was only one word to describe how she felt, and that word is death. Gee felt like death.
"Fine, but I'm staying out here. You can talk to me if you'd like. Y'know, through the door..." Lindsey softly said, her voice dripping with empathy as she slid down the door to sit on the floor on the other side.
Gee had no idea what to do. Maybe talking to Lindsey would help? It normally did... No. She wasn't going to show so much emotion. It wasn't like her.
And yet she did.
She stood up slowly after about five minutes of an awkward silence between the two of them, careful not to move too quickly. She didn't want to pass out from losing too much water. Crying always took everything out of her. She leaned on the door for support, her eyes still closed and her breath slow. She opened her mouth to speak.
"Lindsey? Can you get me a glass of water?" She croaked, her voice lacking any emotion or kindness. She knew Lindsey wouldn't mind the sharpness of her words. That wasnt what she wanted to say. It seemed like all the words she wanted to say were stuck jn her chest mixed with the flames, burning up and never to be heard. Lindsey sighed from the other side and stood up.
"Ice?" She asked
"Mhm."
"I'll be back in a sec. I'm gonna need you to unlock the door when I get back." And with that Lindsey walked across the small house to the kitchen and left Gee to sit on the floor of the bathroom, alone again.
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lol hey im karmen and im writing a frerard story bc otp
