Chasing Love.

Chp -18

Aiza called me saying ..actually ordering to take her to meet her parents. I agreed . C'Mon she is also in a shock and pain this wedding has taken place against her will too. I went home to pick her up . She was ready with packs of makeup and a heavy black dress . Her hijaab was no more covering her hair . She put on her heels and grabbed her phone and clutch. "I m ready!let's go!" She said with a smile. I stared at her arching my brows on her head giving her 'where is your hijaab' look .
Her hair were brown and gently flowing off her shoulders. I don't exactly like her but you know she is my wife and no husband will let a na-maharam gaze at her wife. I m damn sure if she is out like this without her hijaab no men will resist , staring her.
"Zohair! Let's go!! We are getting late man."she ordered.
"Aiza plz wear your hijaab. You look prettier in that."I said .
"Ohh please Zohair don't act like a possessive husband . And I m not wearing it today plz now get up yaar."
"Aiza! Have you lost your senses. Do you know its wrong to show your beautiful hair to others."
"Zohair!! It is wrong to love other woman then your wife. You know whom I m talking about.."
Listening to her words my jaw touched the ground. I felt a pang hiting my chest hard.
"A-Aiza.."

"Umm.. I m sorry . I didn't meant that .I just want you to forget that girl and if you can't lets compromise. You live your way and I will live my way. I won't interfere in your well being and you won't order me anymore.!"she said.
Ya Allah what have I done . I lost her also. Now she also hates me !!
"A-Aiza!So-Sorry." I hesitated.
"Now plz lets leave yaar. "I nodded and we left.

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We had a hearty meal with her parents. Her mom looked really ill and her dad looked sad and depressed coz of his wife and her daughter whom he trusted more than anyone. He said that she has ordered his colleagues to search for her but till now no avail. But now I wish I never face her. She-I hate that girl. She destroyed everyone. We reached home till 10 pm and in some time we slept . She on the bed and I on the couch.
I couldn't sleep . My mind was heavy with thoughts . Why can't people I love stay with me? Why do I have such a least importance in this world? Why can't my own parents try to understand me? Why ? Why Allah?
I couldn't sleep coz my pillow was wet. I couldn't sleep coz my eyes were red and swollen. I couldn't sleep coz this damn world hates me . Why can't I sleep ? I wanna sleep forever!

I know the guys are strong and are expected to hide their tears. But when the whole world hates you, you cannot love anything. I started browsing on my laptop but no. It didn't helped. Anger,regret, guilt ,sadness and confusion boiled in me. To control my feelings I started smoking cigarettes . One,two,three and after the fifth one I was fast asleep.
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Two,Three & four days passed like this.
I worked overtime to get my thoughts away from this sh*t. I started smoking more vigorously. 7 cigarettes a day was normal for the person who smoked once in 17 days. If I wouldn't have met Aliza that day I would have killed him. Aliza stopped me from being a monster. Ya Allah till now you have protected me from being a mafia. I still remember the offer I was given to enter in the mafia gang. I was about to agree when you controlled me forcing to say no.
And after 2 years the same chance came and this time I agreed but when I was going to engage in the biggest sin just for revenge I saw her and my hands failed.Everyone thinks I saw her first in the university during Aiza and Zayn's fight but she ruined my heart a night before that. If I wouldn't have saw her that night I would have killed him . I still remember that night.

Flashback
I was dressed in black,face covered with a black mask. I had a sharp silver knife in my hand.
My victim was in front my eyes with few hijabi girls, having ice cream . I waited for him to go alone towards his car parked across the road It was the best chance. The road was also empty. I just need to slit his neck and run. I proceeded towards him and was just few inches away from him when a soft hand pulled me away behind the car.
"Whoever you are please forgive him. He is my cousin and i know he had fell in the hole of crime few years ago but now he has changed. He is already in depression , you want money take this ,take this also but don't t harm him please."she removed her jewelry and placed in my palm. Her innocence drew me to an another world. "Aliza what are you doing there come fast" one of the girl called her and she left after pleading me with her eyes.
That incident froze me and I couldn't kill him .
Instead i fell for her.

Flashback ends

I m so thankfull to her and ofcourse you allah .The one who changed my heart left me alone. Ya Allah plz help me stay loyal to you and my wife. I would have misunderstood her. She never meant to be with me but......
Oh gosh!! What am I thinking . My thoughts were hopeless and point less. Nothing is correct. I m only wrong . My birth was a mistake. I am itself a mistake. Allah save me ...Save me from this hell. My mind always fought a conflict to sleep.. I became silent and reserved.
I just used to pray five times a day and sit in the office . My life became pointless. My life lost its taste. Enough ! I don't wanna live anymore. I was surrounded by these thoughts each and every minute..

It was 3 in the afternoon. I went to a place about 2 and a half hours away to our office to meet a client. Long time passed since I came here. So I met the client and our meeting ended about 2 hours later.
I decided to take a long route coz I love driving in stress and these days are stress full as you know.

Suddenly my car started heating up. Ooh freak I forgot to feed it with the coolant. The road was almost vacant with few houses quite separated from each other." Cold water can help" i thought and searched for the water bottle I usually keeps in the car.
Gosh!!! I left the bottle open spilling it in the car. Now I don't have water also. No mechanic is seen here. I think I need to borrow water from these houses.

I knocked to a white and red colour house . The name palate revealed the name "Khan's.." . I rang the door bell and a young girl dressed in a tight fitting dress stood in front of me. The face looked familiar but I couldn't exactly recall it. The lady looked surprised seeing me . She must have recognized me. "Ya"she said hesitating.

"Actually I need some water for my car ,can I get some plz." I asked lowering my gaze .

An expression passed through her face. She looked satisfied and confused.
"Hmm wait."she said as another damiliar voice echoed y ear raising my heart to raise and my breathe to stop for a second.

"Aysha plz yaar!" This is -th-is -is-my-A-Aliza's-voice.
The lady in front immediately closed the door saying,"I will bring the bottle from inside."
Before I could say anything the door was slammed on my face. I rang the bell continuously to reveal Aliza . Aliza. I heard a bang from inside. Soon the door was open. "What's wrong with you man ? Can't you have some patience . Take the bottle and get lost. " she again tried to slam the door on my face but I stopped her.
"Call Aliza! I saw heard ." I yelled.
"Get lost man. Wait."
She closed the door and I banged get door hard.
Few seconds later tote woman returned again handing me a piece of paper. "Read this and leave. "
I opened the letter wich revealed Aliza's writing.

Dear Zohair,

I m very sorry for what I did. But now let me leave my life on my way. Plz leave. You are meant to stay alone. Plz stop chasing me...

Aliza. ......

My heart sanked again and I felt the same way I felt when Sana di and Na'iraah left. Alia is dead for me now. She is dead.
I hate her . My thoughts were interrupted by my dad's call.
"What the hell Zohair ? Wgere are you? I told you to bring your mom-s medicine . Now plz hurry up without forgetting it." He cut the call saying that . He didn't even listened to me.
I put the water in the car cooling it and left from there gathering the shattered and broken pieces of my heart. I drove quite fast . Speeding through I halted at a chemist for the medicines I was ordered to buy and leaned home.
I handed him medicines and went to my corner in the store room.
I opened the albums and revealed our childhood pictures.
Na'iraah(Zohair's sis ,her story is mentioned in Chp-6)and me . Childhood was just awesome. No worries. No tension. But due to one mistake everything ended like this. My parents hated me and my guardian my Sana di got blamed coz of me . Today she dead just because of me . Aliza I loved her too but she also went. And Aiza is my present and now i m hurting her. I hurt everyone Allah help me plzzz plz.