Chapter 10
Victoria was out the door and running away from the house like a lightning bolt before she knew it.
She had absolutely no desire to listen to her father. Asking her to quit dance? Had his brain been taken over by aliens? Or was he being possessed? If he was really her father, he wouldn't ask her to give up what she loved the most, would she?
What did she just say? Just think? She stopped running, trying to stop her frantic breathing and the tears streaming down her face. What she loved the most: she had said dance. Not her parents, or her family, no, no. She said dance. Over everything and anything else.
Victoria felt so ashamed of herself, she just wanted to shrivel up and rot in a corner. Her parents were everything to her-- or so she had thought-- until now, when her heart had made the real decision for her.
"And you would sacrifice anything for her, right?"
Her father's words echoed in her brain.
Sacrifice.
What had Victoria ever done to deserve this? She wasn't a murderer or on America's Most Wanted list! Why did such a precious thing needed to be taken away from her?
Victoria squeezed her eyes shut. Maybe, just maybe, her father would come looking for her. "Victoria, I miscalculated after all!" he would say. "You were right! You can continue dancing, just as you wanted to." And then they would embrace each other and laugh and talk over the misuderstanding. And then Victoria would be going to the Lakewater Dance Academy as usual, and everything would be fine.
Maybe it could really happen if she squeezed her eyes shut tight enough.
Victoria opened her eyes uncertainly, then sighed. Go figure.
Through her tear-filled eyes, she tried to get a hold on her surroundings. Somehow, her legs had automatically taken her to her second home: Lakewater Dance Studio. She felt like throwing up. Everything was happening because of dance: her life seemed totally controlled and affected because of it.
Why? Why did the world have to pick on her, huh? Couldn't fate be kind and give back what Victoria had lost?
It was as if part of her body refused to function properly. Her skinny shoulders trembled and her chest heaved up and down. Her knees buckled, and Victoria toppled to the concrete ground of the parking lot. Her sobs could be heard from across the street as she buried her face in her hands and wailed. She hated her life, hated how things had suddenly turned out, hated the world in general. But most of all, she hated herself. Because she had been acting so selfishly. And especially because she was being unfair to her parents. None of this was their fault. Her mom didn't choose to have a heart attack. Her father only wanted to do the best for her and Victoria, and that meant no dance. From their point of view... everything made sense. If Victoria really was the respectful and understanding daughter of the family, then she would have to just cope with the circumstances until her mother came out of the hospital.
It sounded so simple. So easy.
But Victoria still couldn't completely wrap the idea around in her head. She desperately tried to, because right now, her family needed her. And if that meant taking leave off of her job, then Victoria was willing to do so.
"Victoria, wht are you doing here so late? Did you want to practice?"
Victoria's head shot up and stared at Mrs. Fonteyn, who was locking the door of the studio. She carried her duffel and walked over to her student, who quickly stood up.
Victoria somehow found her voice. "Um, no-- uh... I was walking..." Hopefully Mrs. Fonteyn wouldn't notice her puffy eyes and scratchy voice. If she noticed them,she didn't show any sign. "Would you like me to drive you home?" she asked.
Victoria nodded, licking her chapped lips. "Thank you," she managed to say. She followed her teacher silently to her red buggy with the convertible tope. The same car that took her to the hospital to see Mom, she thought miserably. The memory was hazy,like she had been drunk, and she didn't remember very much of what had really happened. Victoria sat in the shotgun seat, staring out the windowshield blankly. The street seemed like a whole new world to her as she gave directions to Mrs. Fonteyn. How could anything be the same after her life had been so drastically changed?
Mrs. Fonteyn pulled up in front of Victoria's house. Before Victoria could get out, she faced her. "Are you alright, my dear?"
It was a completely harmless question, but hearing it made Victoria want to wilt into a corner all over again. In attempt to answer Mrs. Fonteyn's question, she swallowed the lump in her throat and said shakily, "Yes."
Wonderful, Victoria thought. Now she was lying to her own teacher. It wouldn't be long before she would be smoking and doing drugs.
The raised eyebrows told Victoria that Mrs.Fonteyn didn't believe that bold-faced life for a second. She'd just found her best student crying in the middle of the parking lot! You didn't see that every day.
"Is anything troubling you, Victoria? Things at home? Is your mother alright?" Her teacher's voice was soft and gentle.
Victoria laid her trembling hands in her lap. Biting her lip, she contemplated whether lying would be a good idea or not. She didn't think she was really ready to tell anyone the information that Victoria had just digested. But this was her ballet teacher, which meant that you had to respect her. Lying obviously wasn't going to give Victoria her a one-way ticket out of this situation. She kept her eyes trained on her shoes as she spoke. Just one sentence.
"You won't be seeing me anymore, Mrs. Fonteyn."
