Dearest Diary

Trust

Name : Gabriella Valdez
Age : 19
Birthday : December 8, 1995
Hobbies : listening to music, reading, "tunganga" , eating , sleeping.. And many more to mention

Now that you know me you can call me gab. I really love to be called by that because it suits my personality-- a talkative person (gabby).. As you've read on my personal data I have less physical activities therefore you can conclude that I am fat. Hahaha. And yes your right. Mataba ako. Ang sakit pero oo. Kelangan kong tanggapin iyon. Hmpft. Laging nabubully? Check. Kaya kung ikaw payat, pasalamat ka kasi hindi mo nararanasan iyong ganitong sitwasyon. I' m really depressed sometimes. Pero life must go on. Until such time I have learned to conceal how broken I am. Hahahaha. I just laugh out loud. I even bully myself. By that no one knows that I am broken inside. Tss. I successfully made a strong cover of my emotions. They don't even notice that I am an adopted child. Hahaha. How would they know? Like what I've said before, I have built a strong cover of my emotions. But I admitted it to them one time since nagkukuwento ako at nadulas ako. Na shock nga rn sila e. Normal reaction ng mga kaibigan mo n ang akala lagi ang tibay mo. Hindi nila alam halos maisip mo ng magpakamatay nalang dahil sa sobrang sakit. But I'm thankful to HIM, he never lets me kill myself.... Would you blame me.. Like any other adopted child, I also feel insecurities in life.. Masakit dn kasi kahit papaano na malaman na ampon ka, pero iyong maramdaman yun? Para ka na rin lng binabalewala ng boyfriend mo. Hahaha. Pero okay na rin. Kasi salamat talaga sa nasa taas malawak ang understanding na binigay nya sa akin. Pero kahit malawak understanding ko. Putek! Dahil sa TRUST na yan. Umabot sa sukdulan ang pag intindi ko. Naku! Kung ikaw magulang, magtiwala ka sa anak mo. Kasi kung hindi mo mapagkatiwalaan ang anak mo, ibig sabihim you are a failure. Why? Because you didn't raise your child as good as you want. Tss.

Nakaka stress ngaung araw na ito, pagod na nga utak mong gumawa ng project tapos ganun pa sasabihin nila. Parang ayaw ko tuloy silang makausap. Gusto ko ng mapagsasabihan. Kaso I'm too weak to share it with my friends? Bakit? Kasi nga sabi ko na kanina d b? They speculate that I had a perfect family even though I am an adopted child. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Disadvantage of being too strong outside.

Binilhan ko lng naman si mommy ko ng cp e, hainako, nangupit naman na raw ako. Sa kanila lang iyong pera nila. Put*angin* talaga. Gusto kong sumigaw ng malakas at magmura. Para malaman nila mag aapply kami ng scholar, gaano raw ka sure na maaapprovahan un? Mga siguro 99%. Paano ko nalaman? Kasi academic scholar iyong aapplyan namin. Ibig sabihin iyong mga nakaabot sa required average ang mga pwede dto, edi kailangan nalang ng kaunting effort na ilakad iyong mga requirements.

So much for that. Thank you for reading this far. I just want you to know that, even though they didn't trust you now, still do good things to them. Magtitiwala rn sila. At kung hindi man sila magtiwala sa iyo, hindi mo na kasalanan iyon, kasalanan na nila iyon at mas lalong kawalan nila iyon... If you can't find a good person then be one

See you on the next chapter of may feelings. Hahaha. Mas mahaba na siguro iyon. Nagmamadali ako ngayon, baka magsara na sila e hindi pa ako naka brush. Godbless.