Crevasse.

Chapter 3

“I locked myself up in the bathroom and splashed some cold water on my face. I couldn’t believe what was happening. As I clutched the sink it started out again. First as a distant growl, slowly closing the distance till I could hear his voice as if he was standing next to me.

No. NO. Noooooo. I tried to drive him away but he wouldn’t go. I clamped my hands on my ears but I could still hear him as clear as daylight, laughing at my misery. Go away! I screamed with all my might but all he did was snicker.

I rushed out and sank into my bed. There had to be a way to get away from him before he sank his claws into me. I buried my face into a pillow and tried to drown his chortle, but with no success.

He was after me, after what he thought was his. How could I give it to him? How could I do it! There was no way I could let him get to me, make me do what he wanted. No, I wouldn’t. I couldn’t.

I saw his shadow creep in through the windows. This was new, I hadn’t seen this before. His face snarled at me. His face contorting, shifting sometimes, iridescent, sneering at my consternation. He whispered, telling me not to reign in, hold back but to unleash my innermost desire. To savor happiness and frolic in their despair.

My senses froze and I lay there paralyzed as the shadow beckoned to me, to join them in him promenade of demise. I lay there, stuck and tried to blink him away like a bad dream but he just stayed, swirling in the pale moonlight. And languidly, the mist seeped out into the cold night, the way it had come in.

I sat up, cold and clammy. The derisive voice spoke to me, this time resolute.

“You know what you need to do. Don’t run away, don’t hide because however far you go, I’ll find you. And there will be consequences. They wronged you and I saved you. Saved you from yourself. This is the only repayment I want. Being a dastard will only get you so far, but I will come looking and I won’t go away. Till my appetite is sated.”

 I clawed at the air, trying to drive him away. Away from me. From my happiness. My life and my love. I felt him before I heard his roar of amusement.

Tears flowed down my cheeks and I knew it was a lost cause. Sooner or later he would be back and there would be no reasoning with him. The sooner I agreed to his conditions, the more I could be sure that I could keep it under control. Keep him under control.

I nodded slowly. I could do this. I had fought him before, I was strong enough to keep him complaisant. He saw victory and he knew he’d get his way. He would get to me and he would make me do his bidding. His dirty work, whatever he needed to keep him cognizant and animate, enough for him to coerce another poor being into submission like he had to me.

I had escaped the swell of the tide before, the call of restitution. I could hold it back. I could make this work. I didn’t have to be what he demanded of me. he couldn’t change me, the very essence of me. Could he? would he?”