Jacquotte

Chapter 9

 She snatched him up, holding him tightly, desperately. She ran to the other maids' room, bursting in and waking them. They glared at her, blearily angry, but then saw Roussel in her arms. The didn't need explanation, somehow they knew. The older woman, Mary, took Jacquotte by the shoulders and led her to the bed. Bea, the younger one, tried to pry Roussel away. Jacquotte held fast, tears streaming down her face.

"Jacquotte, dear, let Bea hold Roussel. It's okay, now," Mary spoke firmly but gently.

Jacquotte could do nothing but obey. Bea quickly wrapped Roussel in a blanket, and left the room. Jacquotte completely broke down, screaming and begging for Roussel to come back. Mary had to hold her down to keep her from hurting herself. Somehow she broke free from Mary, and ran to find Roussel. She needed him. He had to be okay.

But Roussel was already gone. Bea came back but was no longer holding him. Mary brought Jonasen to Jacquotte, who was whimpering from being awoken so abruptly. Jacquotte cuddled Jonasen, lost but taking comfort in her son. Her tears were endless, and she stayed hunched over holding Jonasen for the rest of the night.

The next few days she moved as if in a dream. Deep in her mind, she begged for this to be just a nightmare, but she knew better. The innkeeper tried to help by giving her even more tasks, to keep her mind off of Roussel. Jacquotte was walking down a street to buy soap at the market with Jonasen slung on her back, and saw a girl around her age sitting against a stone wall, wearing dirt-encrusted rags for clothes. She looked absolutely miserable. She looks how I feel. With a terrifying clarity she saw her future as that girl, and suddenly Jacquotte was infuriated with herself. When have I gotten so pathetic? Look at me, moping and complaining, but what am I doing to change anything? Nothing! Matteo and Maman would be so disappointed if they saw me now. I chose this path, and now I have to walk it. Now I'm in charge.

Jacquotte did not buy soap at the market. She strode back to the inn, and ignored everyone's pitying looks as she stormed up to her room. Setting Jonasen on the bed, she changed into breeches and a shirt, strapping her pistols to her sides and shoving her buckler in her boot. She made sure her knives were in place, and opted to carry the cutlass. She slung her rucksack over her shoulder and strapped Jonasen to her back. It was time to return to her roots of piracy.