So.. This is going to be an interesting entry.
This entry is just going to be me venting, so if you don't like that..please move along. For you own sanity. Thanks. I did say that I would write thoughts and feelings in this book, so here I am.. Here goes nothing.
For the most part I've been a happy individual, but the last couple of years or so have really affected me and I don't really know why... I'm not bullied, I have people who care about me, I know that, but I can't help but feel so alone. I feel like my so called 'friends', family and just everybody in general hates me and I don't know why I feel like this. I'm not depressed and I know that. I have a bit of anxiety and this makes every day hard. Anyway these past couple of months or so I've been feeling really alone.. You see the group I hang with, that are supposed to be my friends, have 7 people in it. Not including me. So that would mean everybody has at least one person they're really close to....
Wrong.
Everybody is really close to each other, but I don't have anyone really. We have a group of three and two groups of two and I'm left with no one.
I know, I know. I could just get really close to someone in the group of three or I could just 'man up' and talk to someone, but I just can't and I'm not saying I don't like them, but well.... Let's just say I have my reasons. Okay? Okay.
Anyway, I've been feeling really alone at the moment and I want to talk to someone..anyone.. I want to vent all these feelings to someone close to me, but I can't. So that why I'm here, today. If someone's reading this now and wants to help, please could you? I've been having suicidal thoughts and I don't know what's stopping me from just committing. I've tried. I've gone as far as picking up the knife, but I just can't do it. I don't know..
And I know that people are suffering way worse than me and way bigger problems, but i don't know. I just can't deal with it anymore.
Anyway, I'm not going to depress you anymore with my thoughts. So I'll see ya on the flip side? Peace..
YOU ARE READING
My Online Journal
RandomA random book where I write random stuff. Read if you must. I may or may not be crazy, but I'm not...I swear it. ;-; Anyway this is my online journal where I'm going to write thoughts, feelings, I may or may not rage(can't promise anything :3) and a...
