Prologue
“Anna, Anna, stop it. You have to let me go. Anna!”, I almost jumped out of my seat. It was all to real. I could almost feel his repulsive hand on me.
“Is there anything I can get you sir,?” A stewardess had her hand on my beat up Nike sweatshirt. I grimaced at her perfect nails touching my arm. She finally noticed my disgust and mover her hand away.
“No thank you”, I turned my head back to my window as she coughed nervously and walked away. I closed my eyes again… so vivid, so clear.
“Look you little shit. I didn’t drive you around to get your damn license so you could ask me to borrow my car just because you want to go on a joy ride,”.
“But you smashed MY car with a crow bar!” I protested with as much sass as to not get myself beaten.
“Are you talking back to me faggot!?!” Obviously I gave to much. I flinched as I heard him wind up. I have such a tolerance for pain now.. it’s un-human.
Chapter 1
I think I’m so used to him hitting me the ringing is quieter. Or I’m crazy. Most likely the later. “I did that to teach you a lesson!” I’ve learned to almost leave my own body when he gets like this. I’m pretty sure I’m on the floor and he’s kicking me. “Just like I’m doing now!”, I don’t remember how long this time went on for, but it hurt far worse than any other time.
I tried standing. I woke up again in a cold sweat. I tried to remember what came after that. I remember a lot of pain, and mom saying you deserved it. I remember black. I shook my head and tried for a peaceful sleep again.
“Anna.. Anna baby, you up?”, I crept ever so slightly into her poorly painted pink room. Her floor was a cold gray slab masked with a princess rug. Anna was, as it appeared, sound asleep in her bed. I turned to leave.
“What does that word mean?”
“What word sweetie?”
“Faggot”, she said in her innocent voice. She is very smart and I could tell she knew it was a bad word. “Manny calls you that a lot.”
“Anna! That is a very nasty name. A name that only nasty people say! And how did you hear that?” I asked, kneeling down beside her bed.
“The floors are thinner than you think”, I shook my head and smiled at her. I kissed her forehead moving her curls out of the way. “So are the walls”, she whispered.
“You cry a lot Andrew, what’s your fault? You say that a lot ‘it’s my fault’ “, I could have cried right then and there, but I promised myself I wouldn’t show weakness in front of Vivianna. I would be strong because I’m the only ‘good’ person she has to look up too. Yeah, she’s going to be so fucked up, and it’s going to be my fault..
“Everything. Anna listen, I’m leaving for a while, but I’m going to come back for you, okay?”
“Where are you going?”, she hastily grabbed my hand. She looked at me, with those eyes, her eyes looked like his. They both were filled with so much knowledge. Even for a six year old.
“I can’t tell you baby, but I’m coming back.”
“No wait!”, she grabbed me tighter.
“Anna, Anna, stop it. You have to let me go. Anna!”
I remember running to my beat up car. I remember Anna screaming out her upstairs winder as I threw all I had in my trunk. I remember him grabbing me.
I ran.
