Grazed Heart

Dedicated to holliehannah for being such an amazing person to talk to and also being one of the first people to read this piece of work and supporting me throughout :) and not to forget for being an awesome writer.

Cover by: plushybear
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A soft hum of weeping eyes, the deadly tick of the clock hand, all ridden out by the constant echoing remembrance of that crashing boom and thunderous cry – scarring my mind for eternity. Cold shivers slither down my spine, a hiss escaping my parted lips that are numb with pain and misery of remembrance. My sun-kissed skin, clothed head to toe in a night sky stripped of all its stars, hugging each curve and bend. Swollen eyes, stinging with tears daring to fall and stain my cheeks with their sorrow as they look upon the sight before them, within the piles of glimmering snow glows the epitome of death. Laying in his new bed, with no breath to release or moment to see. There in the prison which is his new home, ghastly pale and numb of movement, lies my beloved. With his chiselled jaw, blanketed in a layer of unshaved stubble; his piercing green eyes, blackened from the lack of life; his structured body, limp and dead, still scarred with the murderous wound within him.

The memories will never be erased of that torturous moment. The remembrance will forever be upheld of his undoubtedly sacrifice. The love for him will never fade, not an inch even for a moment. Nothing will ride out the echoing remembrance of that crashing boom and thunderous cry when the bullet of cleanest metal committed the dirtiest crime. Piercing through his chest, like a knife through a cake, causing the deepest and richest red blood to come spooling out and surrounding him in a sea of roses. His emerald orbs looking up to his reflection in the night sky, eyes fluttering and wishing to stay alive. The only sound resting upon us, the slapping of my sandals against the concrete road and the heaving of his chest as he struggled to breathe. And then, breaking all noises, the deafening scream, summoned from the pit of my stomach as I screamed his name, it sounding so angelic on my tongue. I covered myself in his blood, stripping out of my shirt to press it on his wound. The blood painting my hands a permanent red. My tears fell, mixing in with his blood like a crystal in a mountain of mud, the abundance of red blood was a pool for us both to swim in, together; a bath for us to bathe in, together; a bed for us to lay in, together. The future ahead of us together was no as bright as the blood we now lay in, sunken deep into a pit of nothingness, where even death seemed like child's play and a for longing desire. Beneath my cries of his name, begging for him to awaken and turning my head to the side to scream forbidden profanities at his sinful murderer, was the silent shattering of my existence, a spindling crack, forming elegantly upon my bleeding heart. It shattered, piercing every nook and cranny of me from inside, burning me in its wounds in an explosion of pain. Just like all our promises, our vows, everything is destroyed. It is an epitome of hurting. An abundance of pain. It is death.

My burning eyes, stare vigilantly at upon his coffin as the mournful people who loved him begin to file out. I remain, however, unmoving. And soon, the feeling inside me is displayed, I am left alone with no one around me. With no one to hold me, with no one to talk to me, to make me laugh and cry, to take me out, to make me swoon and turn my legs into jelly. With no one to lay tender kisses upon me, whispering three forbidden words as I reply with four. For this person is gone. Forever. And so I begin to move, one step at a time, one foot in front of the other. I reach my love and with my free hand, I run my fingertips across his mahogany case, carved perfectly from the wood, precisely for this purpose. I trail my fingers up and down its length until I finally stop when I reach its head. I bend down and delicately place my lips upon the wood, laying upon him a kiss that will last for eternity. I move back and look down at him. I bring up my hand with thorny stems clutched in them tightly but the pain bothers me no for the hurt inside of me is by far greater. I place the flowers upon him, the thorns having drawn blood from my hand and so it stains the coffin with a mark of red. However, it compliments perfectly with the redness of the roses I had laid there. Roses of the brightest red, grown in the freshest field that we had laid in as we made our forever. Our forever which was now destroyed but for only in this life. We still have our eternal forever ahead of us in another life. One in which we shall be together and joy will be upon us. One in which our love will be stronger than anything that has ever lived before. Our promises will live strong and upheld and our time together would be a precious gem. We would have our forever and always like planned. But for now I shall remain with a shattered heart, broken promises and an unbearable pain of hurting. For now, this is my forever.

And so with one last delicate kiss upon his coffin, I bid my love farewell, for now as I will see him again tomorrow. I will visit him forever until our forever. Every day for eternity, bringing him a rose a day and a story of the events of the day. My love for him will too remain, untouched and alive. I will forever remain in with the boy laying before me as I turn away and begin to trudge across the rocky path, kicking a pebble every now and then as tears are a waterfall out of my eyes. I leave the cemetery with one last glance and a promise to visit tomorrow and then I continue on my way but I do not return home. I, instead, walk down the sullen street, ignoring any looks I receive because of the mess I'm in and the trash I look like, until I reach the place. I reach our field. And I lay down and cry.