"I can't believe that he just left you there like that!" My stepmother cried out for what felt like the 30th time. I rolled my eyes and sat back in my seat. I understood why my boy friend left me standing alone in line at Walmart. We'd had an argument and he needed to leave before he said something stupid. I respected his power to walk away. I really did. Watching him walk away, not knowing if he'd come back, did worry me though. I knew I wouldn't be able to sit still until he came home.
Nick and I have been dating for almost a month. It was going pretty fast from the begining. I needed a place to live so I moved in with him and his roommate. It was going pretty well but things started to get messy. I found myself getting mad at him for silly things.
Don't get me wrong, I love the guy. He's great. Just some of the little things that he does drives me insane!!!
Anyways, the magic was still there so I knew I couldn't give up on him yet. I could feel it when we were alone and going for walks or just watching movies together. It was the way he would look at me that made me keep moving forward with him. It was the way he would lay on the couch with his arms open hoping that I would fill the void with my tiny body. There were a lot of little things that Nick did that made me crazy about him.
He was a really sweet guy.
Today wasn't a problem to me. Nick just needed some time to cool down and then he would be back, smiling and gazing at me with the adoring look he used when I was with him.
My step mom dropped me off at my place and I went inside and set up the floor lamp that I bought for our apartment. It was nice. It had 3 shelves on it and the top of it looked marbly. It looked great set up.
Unfortunately, the lamp had been my distraction from Nick. Now that I had it set up, he was all I could think about. My mind buzzed with questions. Where was he? Was he going to come home tonight? Will he forgive me? Does he still love me? Who is he with? Is he okay? If I called him, would he answer?
The longer that I sat there on the couch, looking down at my phone, the louder the questions became until finally I had to go find him. I knew where I wanted to look first. His step moms house was a convenient place for all him and his pals to hang out at.
I grabbed my sweater and began the journey up there. I knew he'd be there. He was sitting in the living room playing video games.
"Nick, can we talk?" I asked quietly. I was pretty shy around his family. Nick glanced up at me in shock, "You found me?" I chuckled, "It's not hard to find you when you always go to the same place."
He got up and walked outside after muttering "Damn."
The fact that he hadn't wanted me to find him hurt my heart. I didn't know what to think so as I went outside, my mood worsened. It didn't help me out while talking to him but I didn't know how to change it.
It wasn't long before he was getting angry with me again. I couldn't stand it. I stood up and walked away. I could feel his eyes on my back as I walked down the driveway. I wanted to run home, I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream but most of all, I wanted him to chase after me.
I was at the door when it hit me that he won't chase after me. He won't stop me from walking away. I realized that maybe, just maybe, he was tired of me.
That thought had me crying all night.
