The Dying Heart (On a Hiatus)

Chapter 1: Arriving A New Me

Chapter 1

I envy happiness. To me, happiness is a way to mask someone's sadness, like a mirage that tricks others into thinking everything is good when in reality it's not. I've been "happy" for the past two weeks, ever since my parents told me we were moving. And although they think that I have finally lived up to the idea of moving across the country like I always do, I haven't. And I never have.

How can someone expect me to be happy when they practically rip my life away from me? Almost each and every year they take it all away like it's a cookie that I'm not suppose to be eating. But life's not a cookie. When my parents were growing up, they both had a group of friends they grew up with since their days in diapers, and guess what? They all graduated together too. I will never have that. So of course they wouldn't understand. My parents, they think that it is an opportunity to explore the world and make new friends, but ultimately, having to start from scratch is hard, and having to make new friends is hard. I want a stable life. I want a home that I'm familiar with. I want to have best friends, and I want to have relationships that last more than just a year.

They never know how I feel about moving because, quite frankly, I don't get along with either of my parents very well. Well, I get along with my mother more than my father. My mother works with the government, doing some job that I'm not allowed to know about and is at work almost fourteen hours a day. And my father is a retired and injured war veteran. A few years ago he was in war in Iraq, and was stationed to be there for two years. Three months before he was supposed to come home, we got a call explaining that my father was near a bomb when it exploded. Immediately, my mom booked us a flight to the hospital he was in. That night, my father lost both his legs. And, not to mention, was in a coma from brain damage.

It was a very stressful time for all of us. Luckily, after two months my father awoke from his coma, however he suffered a brain injury that caused his personality to shift, wears two prosthetic legs, and has PTSD.

"Hello everyone, and welcome to American Airlines! My name is Jennifer, and I will be catering to all your needs throughout this flight!" I look up from the window as the annoying, high-pitched flight attendant walks down the aisles, winking at all the guys on the plane. I laugh and roll my eyes.

"Since we are about to take off, let me show you all how to buckle the seat belts, and what the safety procedures are." She picks up an example seat belt from above one of the seats, which causes her overly tight shirt to rise up. Turning my attention away from her, I pick up the safety pamphlet from the back of the seat in front of me, and begin looking through it. Crossing my leg, I begin to wonder. How would everyone react if we did find out that the plane was getting ready to crash? How would I react? Between my thoughts, a voice beeps on the intercom.

"We are now ready to take off. Please buckle your seatbelts." I take a deep breath. Taking my hand, I grasp the seatbelt, and then click it into place. I then release the air that filled my lungs. We really are moving again. I look out the window and watch as the plane is driving to the flying lane and then we begin to lift. We move so smoothly through the air- it always amazes me. I watch as the plane continues to rise above the clouds, cutting through them like a knife. About 20 minutes in, the light indicating that you need to wear a seatbelt blinks off.

Some other flight attendants begin to walk down the aisles with carts of foods, and when they walk past me I ask for a bottle of water and some crackers. Eh, it wasn't really a good snack considering I'd be on this plane for four and a half hours, but it would do. Out of all the flight attendants I've seen though, I haven't seen the blonde one again. I snicker to myself. Probably because she was having a little too much fun in the back of the plane. About thirty minutes later, I see flight attendants coming back down the aisle.