•K A L I•
The cold London air engulfed me like a hug from a person you try to avoid, cold but comforting. I liked it.
The dark alley I take is dirty, unsafe and undignified. Standard commute. If only Deirdre could see me now, this would kill her.
"This is no place for a lady of your stature" she would say
"My dick would have to disagree with you Deirdre" I would say.
Thinking about that funny scenario had distracted my mind and I was now wondering through a random backstreet of London.
"Balls" I silently whispered to myself.
"We'll if it's balls you want, baby I can give you that"
Almost silently.
I spun round to see a sleazy older dick of a man sauntering towards me with his hands in his jean pockets.
"Shit"
"You need to watch your language young lady, or maybe I can watch it for ya?" This man was now getting dangerously close to my personal bubble and to be fair I wasn't sure what was gonna happen or what I was going to do and then ...
"I don't think she wants YOUR help mate" we both turned our attention to a tall goofy curly haired boy standing behind the creep.
He was nonchalantly leaning against a drain pipe, his arms strewn crossed over his chest, his left hand was fiddling with his lip
I could tell this was going to get ugly. But I kind if wanted to see where it was going.a dramatic eye roll jumped into the conversation then.
"Oh yeah, well who's gonna stop me, you pretty boy?" I could tell that I was going to have to call an ambulance for somebody today so I sighed and pulled out my iPhone.
"This should be good" I muttered to myself.
The older pig took a swing at the younger boy causing him to fall back to the ground, suddenly this was getting dangerous and the man was grabbing Harry by the hair on his head and his flannel shirt collar.
I decided now would be a good time to interfere,
"Hey, buddy!" I tapped the guy on his leather clad shoulder waiting for him to turn around, not sure what I was exactly going to do. When he turned his tall broad form towards me and said
"What are you gonna do doll face" with a smug grin slapped on his face
I lost it.
I drew my small pale fist back and swung landing a direct blow to his left cheek.
He fell to the floor with a thud.
And so David had conquered Goliath.
As he lay there on the floor, I directed my attention to the slightly shocked boy lying on the ground below me. I walked over to him and grabbed him off the floor, which he had been casually thrown into when the now out cold stranger approached me,
"Jesus Christ dude, were you TRYING to get your self killed" I yelled as I pushed the kid back with both my small arms, he didn't go far.
"Wow babe, you were really worried about me" he said as he disregarded the push I had just given him. He chuckled and still walked towards me.
"I was NOT worried about YOU, I had just had this jacket steam cleaned and pressed, the last thing I wanted was for that guy to get sleaze all over it"
"Ok babe"
"Stop calling me that"
"Ok, alright fine, can you at least tell me were the nearest hospital is so I can get this busted lip and possible dislocated shoulder fixed?"
"I'll do you one better, let me fix you up, as a reward for saving me" I watched as the corners of his mouth spread across. "But, you never request a tattoo from me, you keep inappropriate comments to yourself, and most importantly, NEVER call me babe again!" He smiled that annoying grin and I spun around.
"Fine with me cupcake" he said as he approached once again. I put a hand on his chest before he got too close, and pushed him back.
I sighed and rolled my eyes, hoping that he wouldn't hear my overly dramatic reaction.
"Ugh. I think I preferred babe.."
I started walking through a broken fence. "You coming, pretty boy"
I turned around to see shock splattered all over his face.
"You know, actually, I-uh- think it's gonna rain so I'll just call us a cab yeah
"Nope, I don't think so,you're doing this my way" he threw a man-style-hissy-fit. Grabbing his arm I tightened a grip over his freakishly large hand with my small pale on.He groaned out of frustration and resisted my attempt to pull him through an alley "what's wrong? Afraid a little rain will ruin your hair?"
I dragged his hand through a broken fence and then down the side of an abandoned line of warehouses. When searching for my first house, I wasn't really into the commercial housing options so I asked to be shown this warehouse, I've been living here ever since.
"Woah, this is...nice"
"Ha ha, very funny pretty boy, it's home"
He looked around the larger furnished building, I couldn't quite tell if he was impressed or ashamed.
"Alright shirt off, wow, will this be the last time I say that to you?" I snapped sarcastically.
"If your lucky, I won't have to put it back on"
"Just sit down lover boy"
"I thought I was pretty boy"
"Yes, but your constant annoying flirting, has earned you a new nickname"
"You know, I happen to find you extremely fascinating"
"Well, too bad, unfortunately, and dear God I feel sorry for this girl, you deserve someone better than me"
