The Girl Who Only Talked To Me

Chapter Two

Skyler and I talked a lot over the next couple weeks. We got to be good friends, but I noticed that some things were wrong, things she never talked about. I didn't understand why an amazing girl like her wouldn't have any other friends. I didn't know why some nights I could hear her crying quietly in her bedroom. I didn't know why sometimes she would come to school with her eyes puffy and red or why she was so shy. I didn't know why everybody at school treated her like she was a ghost or why sometimes she would freeze and look off into the distance as if someone were there.

But she was pretty much my best and only friend at that moment in time.

So I let it slide and didn't bother her about it other than to ask if she was okay when she looked upset and to leave her alone when she asked.

I focused on the times when we were talking and laughing and happy, and the little things like when we'd lay down on the grass and look up at the bright sky, and she'd close her eyes, a small smile resting on her lips.

But my favorite times were when we'd get into stupid arguments over nothing at all because Skyler always got really competitive and passionate, and wouldn't stop talking even when I started arguing for the same side as her, and she'd get mad at me when I'd laugh until she realized the reason, and then she'd forgive me and laugh along.

Those were the times when I felt the closest to her.

Skyler and I grew closer as the days grew colder.

I awoke one night about two months after I had met Skyler to the sound of crying from the window across from mine. I had left it partly open because it had been one of those rare warm nights, but now I was regretting that decision, the cold air seeping into my room, making me shiver. I looked at the clock. 1:45 am. Skyler usually wasn't up this late, and I hardly ever heard her crying anymore, least of all past ten.

A crash sounded from her room, and I got out of my bed in concern. I quickly pulled on some clothes and moved over to the window. I saw that Skyler's window was also open slightly as I pushed mine up, wincing at the loud squeak it made.

The crying stopped and Skyler appeared at the window, eyes red and puffy from crying.

"Are you okay?" I asked worriedly. She shook her head and pushed her window open, swiping at her cheeks with the back of her hand.

"Can you come over, just for a minute?" She asked in a whisper, her voice breaking. "The screens come off, see?" She pushed her window screen up and out, letting it clatter to the ground. "We can get them in the morning, I don't care."

I copied her actions, knowing that going through the door wasn't really an option. The gap between our houses wasn't too wide, seeing as we lived in the crowded part of town that had its postage stamp yards. It was maybe two or three feet, an easy distance.

Skyler disappeared from the window and I heard her start crying again. I pushed any thoughts out of my mind, climbing out of my window and carefully into hers. She was sitting on the floor by her bed, leaning against the wall, her face buried in her hands. I slowly crossed the room, picking my way through the things on her floor and sat down next to her, propping my arms on my knees and letting her cry in silence for a moment before speaking.

"What's going on?" I asked, sliding a couple inches closer to her so our arms were touching.

She shook her head. "I'm so screwed up. I bet you thought you were friends with a normal girl who didn't have any problems. But I'm not that girl." She started crying harder.

I put my arm around her shoulder, trying to think of what to say to her. I had never been good with crying people. "We all have problems," I tried. I had told her a little about my life, but not the full story. "I'm the guy who had to leave his home for the first time in third grade, when his brother died in a car crash and his family couldn't stand to be there anymore. I'm the guy who has been moving all over the country ever since because of his dad's job and his mother being reminded by everything of her other son who's in heaven. My point is, I don't care how many problems you have. You're still the girl I thought you were, and I know what it's like."

Skyler stared at me for a moment before she slipped her hand into mine. "My best friend killed herself," she whispered. "A year ago, tonight."

So much made sense to me with that revelation. I turned to Skyler in shock, squeezing her hand. "You never told me."

Tears continued to roll down her cheeks and I pulled her tighter into my body, not knowing what else to do and just acting out of instinct.

"I was the last one she talked to. I didn't save her in time," Skyler choked.

I shook my head, my face scrunching up in concern. "No. Don't say that. Some people can't be saved."

"She could have," Skyler whispered. She bit her lip and rubbed the tears out of her eyes with her fist.

I reached over and pulled her hands away from her face. "You were what? Fourteen? Fifteen?" Skyler nodded. "You weren't there, were you?" She paused but shook her head. Thank God for that. "Nobody could have gotten there in time, Sky. You tried, I'm sure, and you must have been a perfect friend to her, and given her someone to talk to, right?" She nodded again, tears still pouring down.

I sighed. "Sky, I just don't want you to blame yourself. It sucks, I know, and I didn't even know the girl but I'm still wishing she hadn't done it, but we're here and she's gone, and so we're going to have to learn to deal with that. She'd want you to move on, right?"

Skyler moved closer to me, her voice barely a whisper. "I just get the most horrible nightmares. Like I was there and saw it. I'm sure you've heard me when I wake up from them."

I assumed that might have been the cause of the crying that I heard some nights.

"Shh, Skyler, c'mon, let's not talk about it anymore tonight, okay?" I asked. I didn't know how much more I could take. I hated seeing her look so broken and helpless. It was tearing my insides apart even to just hear her cry like this.

Skyler nodded and tried to stop her crying. I pulled her closer to me so that she was wrapped in a tight hug, and then I separated myself from her and got to my feet, holding out a hand to help her up.

"Let's get you back in your bed, yeah?" I asked softly. She took my hand and shakily got to her feet, swaying, which somehow made her cry harder despite her efforts to stop.

I pulled her into a hug and swayed slightly, whispering into her hair the way my relatives had done when we were at the funeral for my brother. "Shh, it's going to be okay. I'm here for you, you're gonna be fine, everything's going to be okay. I promise, it's all going to be okay."

Skyler quieted and we sat on her bed, not speaking for a moment.

"Sorry," Skyler said at last. "I didn't mean to cry so much. It's just- it's a tough night for me."

"At least I learned how to sneak out of our windows," I tried, offering her a small smile.

She smiled through her tears. "I don't even know why I'm crying anymore," she said, wiping at her eyes. "You've made me feel a lot better, but I just can't stop." She wiped her cheeks again and shook her head. "I hate crying in front of people. I'm sorry, I can't make it stop."

I took her hand and laid back on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. "Don't be. We all have to let it out sometimes."

Skyler smiled weakly. "Thanks."

"Are you going to be okay tonight?" I asked, worried.

Skyler nodded and laid back on her bed as I stood up. "Can you stay, just until I fall asleep?"

"Sure, but if you need anything later tonight or ever, you have my phone number, you can always call me for anything, you know that, right?" I told her, sitting beside her bed, still holding her hand as she gave mine a squeeze.

"You're the best, you know?" she said, pulling the cord to turn her lamp off. "Will you tell me a story?"

I told her about the time at summer camp one year when my cabin had pranked another by putting all their stuff on the roof and filling their beds with shaving cream. After I was sure she was asleep, I climbed carefully out her window and into mine, trying my best to close them both without falling through the gap between the houses.