Strangers

Strangers [one shot]

I remember when we talked to each other, I asked you if  you had notes for the upcoming test but you said no, but then I discovered you did which gave me a first impression that you're a liar, but the more we talked I realized that you're not so bad after all, in fact you were better than the rest. You WERE.

As time went by, we grew closer to each other, given that we were seat mates. We already labeled each other as friends because I got to know you more. But what intrigued me most is that I knew that girl you liked. I have my sources but you wouldn't admit it.

This just brought us closer to each other until we talked a lot everyday, in fact you even labeled us as 'best friends' because you helped me and I helped you in a lot of ways. But they said we looked a lot more than friends. That's what THEY said.

I guess time really flew by because it was already second quarter and we had to exchange seats. But what thrilled me most is that we weren't original seat mates but you found a way just to get to talk to me everyday.

Of course a lot of public issues came up about us, that we had a mutual understanding or 'MU' but  I repeatedly denied it and explained that we were just friends. These issues grew larger until it actually reached our class adviser.

Being the typical people we are, we avoided each other the best we can because we lost the freedom we had as friends like before.

What hurt me at that time was that you wouldn't even talk to me or just even TRY. I messaged you a lot but you wouldn't answer.

Me: Hey
Me: Why wouldn't you talk to me
Me: I don't want our friendship yo be ruined
Me: If we really are friends then you shouldn't be affected by what they say about us
Me: Never mind I'm sorry if I disturbed you.

But then I knew why, because you already liked someone else. But what hurt me more is that it was my best friend, it made me actually hate you at that time. I can't accept the fact that you used my best friend as my replacement.

It could've hurt less if it was someone else, but no it wasn't.

Then one day, me best friend told me that she asked you why you wouldn't talk to me anymore, and you said that I was avoiding you and pushing you away.

I never pushed you away. NEVER. In fact I was the one who tried harder, a lot harder to save our friendship. But I guess wasn't enough, like I always was.

I admit I started to give up on us, like you did, I don't know what to do anymore because I miss how we were, how we were so close and didn't think about what they say, how we could sit together without any maliciousness, how we would talk all night and never get tired of each other, how we did many things together without anyone noticing, i miss everything. I miss us. I miss you.

But now I guess it's too late to change how we are. But it's never too late to say sorry, so here I am saying sorry that I gave up on us, I'm sorry that I pushed you away, I'm sorry that I'm not enough AGAIN.

Now I'm free of the struggle of defending us, no scratch that, defending ME from what they all say. But I still miss you and its gonna take a long time to free myself of that.

But I have to accept that you're gone and you won't ever come back, that we won't go back to the way we used to be.

I have to move on because I'm pretty sure you already did.

This is the story of how we started as strangers and ended as strangers.