Bred in Captivity

Jackets and Fingers

For a moment…He paused. I listened…as he breathed. Old Red scent filled the hallway, it burned…like the scents that came off my black fingers…but different. It made the hunger burn twist in my mouth, it made my teeth descend into my lip hard, if I had moved it, I would have cut myself on my teeth. But the scent was mingled with my fear. I was scared. Oh so scared. I could feel his mind…as hard I tried to block him off, to fill my mind with mist, and to make solid white walls around my core…I couldn’t. He touched my mind without trying. He leaked out. Oozed. Touching. Feeling, and burning. I could feel his presence leaking through the doors, I stood, my back to him not moving an inch. My mouth was open, to catch his scent…the same way I knew he was doing. The Mad Others were frozen too. Either dead with the New Minds or far away in the big place for him to get them, I was close. I was still tied up, I had managed to cut away one of the bands…but not all four of them that had my arm tied. I was useless. I was tied tight. I was vulnerable. If he wanted me dead it wouldn’t be all that much effort for him….

But he didn’t.

He exhaled again.

Sometimes I wondered what they’d done to him. To make him so filled with Bad Red, and so filled with those black thoughts. They were as painful as bright light and as frightening as the Chemical Man who would come to my place when there was no light.

He would hurt me.

He was the worst Chemical Man. He wasn’t the only one who would do those bright light things but he enjoyed it the most. I would hear his thoughts during those No Light times. They felt strange. Like the black stuff that oozed from my broken hands.

 I didn’t like them.

I didn’t like the way he would touch me under my jacket, or how he would say strange things. I wouldn’t fight though. Not after the first.

He would always take away my Red if I tried to fight him.

I would go hungry, for a very long time.

The other Chemical men would be  angry for me because I was weaker then they wanted. I couldn’t run the tests. They would be angry at me because he was starving me.

The longest time I tried to wait was ten. Ten times I would sit under the Soft Light, my insides hurting till I couldn’t stand it anymore. Till I stopped fighting Oozing Hurt Chemical Man.

Just because I stopped fighting doesn’t mean he made it easier for me. He made it twice as painful.

I hated the Oozing Hurt Chemical Man the most out of all the Chemical Men.

I wanted him dead.

No I wanted him more then dead. I wanted him starved and cold, and hidden away in the dark where there was no soft light ever. I wanted him to die like that. Scared, and hurting. Then I wanted to cut off his fingers and hurt him where he hurt me over and over and over till all he could do was scream for me to stop.

Maybe I would.

Maybe I wouldn’t.

But it didn’t matter.

I would have left him in that place till he starved.

No matter how much he begged.

The hallway was filled with Old Red scent. It pressed against the door leaking in under it and snapping me from my thoughts. It overpowered the new Red scent. From all the New Minds. All of the nice pure scent was pushed away by the scent of his breath. It was just Dead Red. It was like Red only not. It was painful to smell. It was like a wall…it was unavoidable. But it was like my thoughts, it leaked, it touched, wrapping around my body…pressing down and leaking into my body. It brought my senses no relief. It made my teeth ache, and my lungs painful.