Dear Diary

Complete Silence

       I call myself a girl finding herself. A girl who is trapped in her own thoughts. I need someone to pull me out. Let's just say ive been waiting a very long time for that someone. Guidance is the key to a happy life they say. I wonder why i'm not happy with my life. Is it school? Is it because i never really fit in with the "Cool Kids"? These are just a few things i'm still trying to figure out.

      When i was little i went through a small phase. A phase were i would just fall into complete silence while people would talk to me. Never once would i say anything, i would just stare. Stare them dead in their eyes. I feel like i was trying to figure them out just by looking them in their eyes. Which it didn't really work it only made me look crazy. Till this day i find that amusing. Almost the reason why i act like this now. 

  No one ever questioned my silence, maybe they were afraid of some terrifying answer as if was raped or abused by my own blood. To be completely honest it was never about any of that. I was just a weird ass kid. Like this one time I wanted to be a bird so I would eat worms and peck at my mom. She took me to the therapist, thinking that I needed someone to talk to, but really, I was just this little girl with a free spirit. Now that explains my obsession with birds. Also explains my low radar with babysitting kids. I once scared this kid so bad he shit himself.