Forever Falling

        I remember falling. I don't know why I fell, but now I'm stuck in a sterile, stiff bed in a hospital! I racked my brain for reasons why I could have fallen, but eventually come up short.Thinking back to when I last remembered being conscious, I knew I was marching with my high school band outside. Heat stroke! That must be it, I thought optimistically. Relief flooded my veins, however I knew something was off about my conclusion. I was startled by the sounds of a protesting door open. I peered over and saw the lovely face of my mother.
        "Skyler?" whispered my mother as she noticed me being awake.
        'Come in'  I signed.
        After my mom entered, I wondered if my dad was with her. My unasked question was quickly answered when dad walked in the room. I honestly was shocked, it was the first time I had seen my parents together since their divorce. This having lead to me going to a new school in New York.
        " How are you feeling sweetie?" Dad asked tentatively. He sounded like he was afraid of the answers that were to come. I wouldn't blame him since we haven't talked since the big move.
        'Fine' I silently answered. I only ever spoke in sign language due to the fact I was mute. My parents had had me in lessons since I was barely two. They always wanted to make social life as easy as possible because of my disability.
        The creaky door opened again, but a doctor came in this time. I tried to sit up straighter to show respect, but somehow couldn't. The most I could do was barely nod to show the man acknowledgement. He walked further into the room and introduced himself as Doctor White. He was a small bald-headed man with beady black eyes.
        "Hello Miss Grey, it's a pleasure to finally meet you" Came the deep, raspy voice of the doctor.
        As the doctor continued to drone on, I daydreamed about my small town in Texas. There you could literally walk across town in ten minutes at an average pace. Plus everyone was so close, it was common to stay at friends houses then walk to school the next morning. I eventually felt tear swell in my eyes, so I changed the subject. I started to think about the doctor. He looked about 50 years old and was about 5''5'. Doctor White kind of sounded like my history professor, Professor Binns, who had the amazing talent of putting high school kids to sleep within minutes. I looked up when something interesting was said.
        "After running several tests, my team and I believe you're daughter has obtained Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis. This disease typically shows up because of a dormant virus that has appeared. The illness' severity depends on the location of the dormant virus. This means the disease can have different ranges of effects. In Miss Grey's case she, at one point, got strep throat which instead of showing its ugly head when she contracted it, stayed dormant in the cerebellum part of her brain. This is the part of the brain in which muscular coordination, balance, posture, and movements are controlled. Now the dormant virus has resurfaced and has resulted in losing the complete control of the cerebellum part of her brain."
        " How do we get rid of the virus?" My mother interrupted.
        " When my team looked into the past cases of this disease. Scientist have concluded that the infection would be fought off by the immune system in a matter of months. However, it is safer to operate on the virus before it gets to severe." Dr. White answered.
          After zoning out a second time I found myself thinking about my situation. Soon questions started swirling around my brain. Why was all this happening to me? What did I ever do to deserve this? Why couldn't I be like every other teenage girl? My thoughts were interrupted when Dr. White spoke to me.
        " Skyler, I understand that you must be very confused, so if you have any questions just ask. I will try to answer them as best as I can ." The doctor stated kindly.
        I thought for a while until a single question popped up.
        'Will I still be able to go to school? I signed for my mother to translate to the doctor.
        "Since the matter is still on a small scale you will be able to go to school. You will however, need to limit yourself though." The doctor said matter-of-factly then added, "Anymore questions?"
        'Yes, when would the operation be?' This time my dad translated.
        The doctor wore a small smirk before answering. " Based on the schedule your parents have given me a few minutes ago, my opinion would be to have the operation in about a week. This is to get the virus out of your system as soon as possible. Now if you will excuse me, I have to check on some more files to verify the operation." The doctor concluded.
        My parents then told me to rest. When they left the room I heard bickering outside. Not thinking much of it, I laid down in the hospital bed and fell into a deep sleep.
        The next few days flew by in a blur, which consisted of me trying to control my movements, being released from the hospital to grab any necessities before the operation, and struggling to up the stairs of my mom's second story apartment in New York.
        Once I got in my room, which involved help from my mom multiple times. I laid down on my familiar bed in the small apartment bedroom. I turned my head toward my window and watched the sunset. Before the bright orb crossed the line which separated the city from the world the sun created a world of fire. Once darkness was about to blanket the city everything awoke.
       I wondered often how a country girl like me could end up in the Big Apple, and how I was now losing control of my movements. I sometimes felt like a cancer patient, which I know I'm not. I just felt like it, and I didn't enjoy being fussed over!
      Again I longed for my small Texan town. There I was normal. Well more normal than I am here, I thought bitterly.
     "Skylar?" My mom asked as she knocked on the other side of my wooden door. She opened the door and crossed over to my bed, then sat next to me.
        "I just got off the phone with your father, and he agrees you should try to attend school tomorrow. He thinks it would be a good time to get any missed work, and grab the work you will need for when you miss school for your operation." She said gently
        I nodded to show I understood her, then awkwardly hugged her.
        " I will come pick you up at 4 o'clock tomorrow to drive you over to the hospital to prepare for the operation." She paused in order to gather her thoughts. "Good night baby, I love you."
        'I love you too mom.' I signed back to her.
She then crossed the small distance to the door and shut off the lights. After making sure I had everything ready for school the next day I went to bed.
         If you think about school, you would probably say it was horrible, but know this it's not too bad. You get to spend time with you friends, goof off in the halls, and participate in activities you enjoy. People even say high school is supposed to be the best years of your life. Unless you're the country girl who just moved to an urban city school, who's mute, and is losing basic control of her movements. Oh, and don't forget that new girl has already collapsed publicly and has missed a week's work in school. I mean I wasn't even surprised to learn the rumors about me had already spread like a thousand wildfires throughout the school.
        I didn't like being the center of attention, so imagine my pleasure being the freak with everyone's eyes on her. In order to ignore the fact that my cheeks were blushing as red as the Fourth of July, I kept my head down and silently stumbled to my locker. Above everything I concentrated on the left, right, left, right pattern of my feet against the tile floor. Thankfully I made it through the halls without totally embarrassing myself.
        As the school cleared out after the final bell. I clumsily went to collect the work I would miss when I was going to be gone. As I headed for the math classroom I heard snickering behind me. I tried to ignore the voices, but the insults kept getting louder and louder. I soon lost my concentration and stumbled on the ground. As I looked up I saw the people whom I wished I would never run into. The popular girls stood a couple feet away from me at this point. Even though this sounds cliche, and I know it does, these girls were true monsters.  Sydney Star, which is her real name, stood in front of the pack of perfectly manicured nails, and bright blond hair. I've only been at this school for a few weeks, but I already knew Sydney's reputation. The most popular girl in school with her long, blond hair, crystal blue eyes, and her parents major credit card, was someone you did not want to upset.
        "Well I don't think we have had the chance to talk, I'm Sydney and you are?" Came her high, snobby voice.
        I looked at the floor knowing what was to come.
         "Oh my bad, you don't talk. Freak!" Exclaimed Sydney as she started laughing. Her entourage soon caught on and started fake laughing with their leader.
         I quickly gathered my things and tried to stand up, but was pushed forward by the cruel girls.
        "No, you can't leave! You see the girls and I felt bad about you're fall, so we have a surprise for you." Sydney made a motion and her clones grabbed me by my arm, then they started pulling me down the hall.
One thing that sucks about being mute is you can't call for help. I even tried struggling against the hold, but I physically couldn't due to the disease I have. I was pulled into the swimming room, and feared the outcome of the girls 'surprize'.
         "Well you see new girl, you have been obtaining a lot of attention lately, so the girls and I thought we would teach you a little lesson on stealing attention from those who truly deserve it." Sydney smiled sadistically then continued, "And stealing is a very bad thing; so we need to help you wash away your sins."
          Finding it useless to struggle, I tried my last option that could possibly free me. I spit in Sydney's eye. I then heard an animal like screech of anger as my saliva hit its target. The next thing I knew I was brutally pushed into the pool. As water enveloped me I thrashed and tried in vain to grab something, anything, but failed miserably since my limbs wouldn't respond to my commands.
         I felt my lungs constrict in an attempt to get oxygen. I  even heard the distant laughter muffled by the water. I felt the heat leave my body as an unbearable cold settled into my bones. My vision seemed to be getting blurry, and dark. I eventually stopped thrashing since I couldn't move my arms. I felt calm, which struck me as weird, because I was most likely going to die. I just wasn't afraid. Many people say that your life flashes before your eyes when you're about to die, that didn't happen to me though. I just closed my eyes and was surrounded by darkness.
                         *    *    *
         I'm falling. I don't know why, but I'm falling again. I'm soaring down an endless tunnel into oblivion. I don't know which way is up or down. I could even be flying up into darkness. However, I'm still going down or maybe up. I have no idea that when or if I land I will be able to pick myself up again, but for now I'm still forever falling.