My Little Journal Entries

Journal Entry: A

Before I start this I want to make it clear that i have no update days, this is when i feel like writing. Also some of this is just well made up, it honestly varies. ENJOY!

I walked in the classroom my first day i was so nervous. I took a good look at all the people. The teacher came to greet me because I was lost, she said hi nice to meet you I could already tell she was faking it, i could feel her sympathy radiating off her. I took a chair near the middle of the room next to some guy who scoffed at me and glared away, he was unhappy to sit by me. I am not a bad student i make good grades, i don't understand why they don't like me, i am just like them.

Through out the year i found a friend, they weren't much of a friend though. Nobody really stayed by my side through it all, there were people who felt sorry for me but they ended up leaving because they got bored. I thought i made a good friend, i thought she was the one. We hung out more and more gaining knowledge about each other. One day it was like we knew too much of the obvious but too less of the undiscovered. Slowly I figured out her secrets but not all. She never found my secrets though, she didn't care about me.

she didn't find I'm....

mental

my demons

Depressed

Anorexic

I call it problems. I hint, but nobody catches.

No one knows

My secret life.

All my thoughts

Are just killing me

Closer

And

Closer

Comes death

It's not far as i reach out i realize i can never leave this cruel world

So close yet so far away.

It kills me on the inside. The voices inside me head unanswered questions, the hatred towards myself.

But it's all kept inside.

I don't need other peoples help.

I'm fine for now.

Don't leave me alone in my thoughts unless you want me dead.

My life is pain hatred and jealousy

But she doesn't know about me

I will remain secret until anybody actually cares.

                          -x