the perfect crime [justin bieber]

03 | the past

jordan

I swear he drove faster than he normally would. Within minutes, we were back at his place which was located at the corner of 1st Ave and E 87th Street. We were both silent for a while, a comfortable silence. Calm before the storm, really. The both of us knew once we were inside and settled the peaceful vibe would get disturbed by what I had to say to him.

He carefully, but hastily locked his bike. Even though I had the key to his apartment, I waited for him so we could go in together. After locking it, he looked up to me and we exchanged a weak smile. I felt a wrenching feeling of guilt building inside of me. I mean, I know I could tell him anything, but even though it was such a small smile, I didn't want to see it disappear from his face.

"Shall we?" he asked quietly, almost whispered, and I answered with a small nod. Again in silence we walked towards the door, which he opened. He gestured for me to go first. Once we were inside, we still had to take the elevator. We were silent all the way, from waiting on the damn thing to actually being inside of it. He pressed the button for the highest floor, him owning the penthouse. While the elevator raced all the way up, I glanced at him via the mirror, but quickly diverted my gaze when I saw him change positions. The last thing I wanted was for him to catch me staring.

After a few minutes - which felt like fucking hours - we were finally inside the apartment. He headed for the couch, while I headed for the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" I heard his confused voice coming from the living room. Without answering I grabbed two beers from the fridge and walked back to him. "That you even have to ask that. Catch." I threw one of the beers towards him and opened mine. After the crack of the tab being pushed down sounded, I brought the can to my lips and took a few generous gulps.

"So..." I plumped down next to him, both feet on the couch, and looked at him cracking open his beer. Before I could even start the story I was about to tell him I got interrupted by his beer overflowing, probably because of the throw. Bursting out laughing, I saw the small moment of panic in his eyes and watched how he tried to minimize the damage by taking a few large sips himself.

"So..." He repeated, chuckling, after he somewhat saved himself from a lot of cleaning.

"So, I haven't felt... like, content lately. I don't really know how to explain what I'm feeling, but.. I-I have been having nightmares and..." I bit my lip and nervously played with the lid of the can. I know that I changed the subject quite bluntly, but I have been struggling with these things for quite a while right now and I just wanted to get them out, finally.

"Nightmares? About what?" The concern he had was noticeable from everything; his concerned voice, the way he went to sit up straight and the worried look on his face. Dammit. I meant it when I said I didn't want that small smile to disappear.

"It's just..." I really had no clue how to bring it under words. "I'm just so fucking nervous. My 18th birthday is coming up and I know that's the age when, like, you get lots of responsibility and you have to close deals yourself and be on the road yourself without backup from the oldies and..." I stopped myself from my flowing words and took the time to catch my breath. "I'm just... Scared. Scared that I won't be able to handle the pressure. With me being related to... Him, you know? There's a certain expectation of me." All this time I had been watching my fingers play with the lid, and I finally dared to look up. Straight into Justin's eyes.

He had a pained expression on his face. "Jo, I had no clue." He put his hand on my foot while keeping his eyes locked on mine. "But I know you'll do great. You being a Capone means it runs in your blood, there's no other way than to do anything other than great. You couldn't fail the task if you tried."